Writing Group: Beginner’s Guide to the Afterlife

Hello, Reapers and Tour Guides!

What do you think lies after this life? Where do we go? Some say we die when we sleep… or is it that we sleep when we’re dead? Maybe both are true? Either way, I think it’s time for you to show what you think waits for us on the other side of the veil, because…

This week’s Writing Group prompt is:

Beginner’s Guide to the Afterlife

RULES AND GUIDELINES BELOW!
Make sure you scroll down and read them if you haven’t! You may not be eligible if you don’t!

Ah, the afterlife. One of life’s greatest mysteries. What lies beyond this mortal plane? Rather ironic that this mystery of life can only be learned after life. Get it? Afterlife, after l— you know what, I’ll just take that to my grave.

The lovely thing about this prompt is that it doesn’t have to be about what lies beyond death. You could write about some big CEO who has fulfilled his career-driven dreams and finally plans to retire. What does one do with their remaining years after they’ve achieved everything they’ve ever wanted? Perhaps you choose to write about the perspective of an apple on the tree, ever growing until it’s plucked to pass on its sustenance to another being. Perhaps you choose to write about the tree, losing apple after apple. Or perhaps you write as the tree that prepares itself for its first wintery sleep. What goes on around it while it slumbers? Will its luscious foliage be missed? Will it be bigger once it wakes? What happens to all of its fallen leaves? You could even just write about a child that had their controller batteries running low. Maybe they’ve never changed the batteries before, it’s always been a parent or older sibling, and now they have to learn how to do it on their own.

You can also just address the death side of this, of course, like maybe you choose to write about someone studying what lies after death. Where do we go? Do we remain on this plane or move to another? Are we truly reborn? You could write about a grandparent that knows they’re reaching the end of their time, and so they go about arranging things with their family. Maybe you choose the next soul that is to take over the position of Death, and how they must go through training to prepare. Perhaps you introduce us to a spirit that is new to the world of the dead. A spirit who is lost, scared, and confused, and has to get through the first steps all by themselves. Or maybe a fellow spirit helps them adjust to this new world. You could even explore what it’s like to be a zombie after they’ve turned. What really goes on in their head? Are they as brain dead as the media portrays? Do they still feel, do they still think? Do they remember who they were before? Do they miss it? Perhaps you even just decide to peek into a dystopian future where all life as we know it has crumbled.

One thing to remember is that this prompt isn’t all about death. It’s about the life that came before, and the whole new life that could be after.

So go now. Breathe life into this new prompt with your immortal creativity.

—Shawna

Remember, this is part of our weekly Writing Group stream! Submit a little piece following the rules and guidelines below, and there’s a chance your entry will be read live on stream! In addition, we’ll discuss it for a minute and give you some feedback.

Tune into the stream this Saturday at 7:00pm CST to see if you made the cut!

The whole purpose of this is to show off the creativity of the community, while also helping each other to become better writers. Lean into that spirit, and get ready to help each other improve their confidence in their writing, as well as their skill with their craft!

Rules and Guidelines

We read at least four stories during each stream, two of which come from the public post, and two of which come from the much smaller private post. Submissions are randomly selected by a bot, but likes on your post will improve your chances of selection, so be sure to share your submission on social media!

  1. Text and Formatting

    1. English only.
    2. Prose only, no poetry or lyrics.
    3. Use proper spelling, grammar, and syntax.
    4. Your piece must be between 250-350 words (you can use this website to see your wordcount).
    5. Use two paragraph breaks between each paragraph so that they have a proper space between them (press “enter” or “return” twice).
    6. Include a submission title and an author name (doesn’t have to be your real name). Do not include any additional symbols or flourishes in this part of your submission. Format them exactly as you see in this example, or your submission may not be eligible: Example Submission.
    7. No additional text styling (such as italics or bold text). Do not use asterisks, hyphens, or any other symbol to indicate whether text should be bold, italic, or styled in any other way. CAPS are okay, though.
  2. What to Submit

    1. Keep submissions “safe-for-work”; be sparing with sexuality, violence, and profanity.
    2. Try to focus on making your submission a single meaningful moment rather than an entire story.
    3. Write something brand new; no re-submitting past entries or pieces written for other purposes
    4. No fan fiction whatsoever. Take inspiration from whatever you’d like, but be transformative and creative with it. By submitting, you also agree that your piece does not infringe on any existing copyrights or trademarks, and you have full license to use it.
    5. Submissions must be self-contained (everything essential to understanding the piece is contained within the context of the piece itself—no mandatory reading outside the piece required. e.g., if you want to write two different pieces in the same setting or larger narrative, you cannot rely on information from one piece to fill in for the other—they must both give that context independently).
  3. Submission Rules

    1. One submission per participant.
    2. Submit your entry in a comment on this post.
    3. Submissions close at 12:00pm CST each Friday.
    4. You must like and leave a review on two other submissions to be eligible. Your reviews must be at least 50 words long, and must be left directly on the submission you are reviewing, not on another comment. If you’re submitting to the private post, feel free to leave these reviews on either the private or the public post. The two submissions you like need not be the same as the submissions you review.
    5. Be constructive and uplifting. These submissions are not for a professional market, and shouldn’t be treated as such. We do this, first and foremost, for the joy of the craft. Help other writers to feel like their work is valuable, and be considerate and gentle with critique when you offer it. Authors who leave particularly abrasive or disheartening remarks on this post will be disqualified from selection for readings.
    6. Use the same e-mail for your posts, reviews, and likes, or you may be rendered ineligible (you may change your username or author name between posts without problem, however).
    7. You may submit to either or both the public/private groups if you have access, but if you decide to submit to both, only the private group submission will be eligible.
    8. Understand that by submitting here, you are giving us permission to read your submission aloud live on stream and upload public, archived recordings of said stream to our social media platforms. You will always be credited, but only by the author name you supply as per these rules. No other links or attributions are guaranteed.

Comments on this post that aren’t submissions will be deleted, except for replies/reviews left on existing submissions.


Comments

56 responses to “Writing Group: Beginner’s Guide to the Afterlife”

  1. Jacob Alexander Avatar
    Jacob Alexander

    ‘Requiem’ by Jacob Alexander, 276 words.

    These shallow hands moved across the piano, fingers falling down on the keys.

    Onetwothree; onetwothree.

    Each sound was the same as the last, bound here by porcelain white shapes. But there was a new life in every pattern. A faint mistake in every tone that suggested many more things about what was happening and had happened. Like a lullaby which too soon forgot itself. Fingers danced attentively.

    Onetwothree; onetwothree.

    The silhouette of a window broke the unknown darkness. A vision of swaying night smoldered through the hole—the backside of trees upon trees—the frame swelling and shrinking by the rhythm of a breath. Bones convulsed under the skin, with hesitance, moving. Continue.

    Onetwothree; onetwothree.

    Light blue veins suddenly struggled against the current of more sounds, a riot as constant as the blank melody. Who was I, these hands asked. What is this, demanded the fingertips. But they only continued to depress the keys, the veneer worndown until shades of rosy wood began to show under each one. The window seemed to call but there was nothing to answer with. And the repetition broke another piece of this place, and no one thing should be responsible for creating these notes again and again. So please allow these frail limbs to reach across the room, before the third note.

    One. But the drifting nature was calling not for the work of those palms, it called out for each song of this nameless piano. Two. Waiting to give them human form, and show them what there was to see at home. Three. And so these shallow hands moved, having lived, and died, and given itself to the next.

  2. Cansas Smith Avatar
    Cansas Smith

    Dear Newly Deceased
    By Cansas Smith (aka CansasTheWanderingMind)
    Repost from private

    Dear newly deceased,

    So, you screwed up and got yourself dead. It happens to the best of us.

    Maybe you got shot passing by an active robbery. Maybe you were the robber and decided to go out in a blaze of glory. Perhaps you we’re some thrill seeker or daredevil who became the victim of an unfortunate accident. You might’ve been featured on “dumbest deaths in history” or had millions lighting candles around the world in your honor. You could have been beat up in a dark alley and left out for the rats. Or ended up just another dead soldier, killed in one of your wars. It is possible that you died of old age, but we both know how unlikely that is.

    Now you’ve woken up in a strange place and are unsure of where you are, or even what you are. Well you need not fear for we are here to help.

    Who are we? I’m so glad you asked. We are the Patrolling Assistant Spirits Spectating and Encouraging Reanimated Souls. P.A.S.S.E.R.S for short. It is our job to guide every soul to it’s next place.

    Some go to heaven and some to hell. Others choose Valhalla and some are sent to Purgatory. Some souls become P.A.S.S.E.R.S and some simply drift off into the abyss. No matter your race, gender, or religion every soul has a place after death. Even animal souls become angels or stars or creatures of hell.

    By the time you are reading these words, a door will have appeared in front of you. This door will lead you to your first option. After you’ve had a look around say the words below and another door will open.

    ”Avaa sielun portti”

    Each door will take you to a different afterlife. Once you have decided on one, let us know and we’ll set you up in your next state of being.

    Should you run into any trouble or require assistance just give us a shout. We’re always be here to help.

    Regards from your personal P.A.S.S.E.R, Epona.

  3. i-prefer-the-term-antihero Avatar
    i-prefer-the-term-antihero

    [Removed]

    1. This was certainly an interesting take on the prompt. I like the idea of spiritual death leading so an afterlife that is essentially one changing as a person. I assume it’s Victor here, who’s talking? If so, that would make his monster all the more interesting, as he is then not denying is aspect as physical death, but spiritual.

      Like I said, the idea of an afterlife meaning change as a person is quite interesting. It plays in the whole death and rebirth cycle, which I’ve seen play out many times before in stories. In a way, it’s less of an afterlife in the spiritual sense and more a way of leaving your old life behind to start a new one, which I feel is a clever play on words.

      Great story!

    2. I absolutely love “Cabin Boy Condescending”. I’ve never heard it before. Did you come up with it? Amazing.

      The whole idea of dying hundreds of Spiritual Deaths during your life really stuck with me. All things have an ending and every ending could be as painful and changing as a True Death.
      It does make me wonder who or what is the emodiment of True Death, or specifically The End Of Life. As well as what constitutes the traditional view of an ‘afterlife’ in this world.
      Or if there even is one.

      The part about Vampires was amusing and unsurprisingly on brand for you as an Author.
      And Victor, now that I take a moment to think about It.

  4. Tyler Chancey Avatar
    Tyler Chancey

    Wandering The Fields
    By. CosmicDesperado30

    Jura kept their pace steady as the seemingly endless streams of ethereal flowers bloomed around them. The pollen danced with images and colors indescribable, but Jura somehow knew them to be pure, an overwhelming lifetime of human experiences glimpsed in an instant. It took them a while before the dog nuzzled their hand and helped guide them through the haze of first steps taken and awkward first dates.

    The meadow grew into hills as Jura followed their glowing guide. The sun, if it could be called that, began to set on the horizon. Its waning presence made Jura nervous, something the dog seemed to sense as it slowed its pace.

    For the first time since they arrived, Jura dared to speak, “Where are we going? Where am I?” their voice sounded strange in their throat as if processed through an imperfect filter.

    “I am guiding you to your eternity,” the dog spoke, its voice warm and comforting in Jura’s mind. That comfort quickly subsided as more questions began to form.

    “Wait, does that mean I’m-”

    “Please, we need to make it through the fields before the sun rises again.” The dog’s warmth swept over Jura once again, dispelling their anxiety.

    They soon saw what it meant. The indelible fields of flowers and welcome hills had decayed away into gnarled trees and open expanses of barren dead grass. Outlines of what could charitably be called people wandered aimlessly about the fields, their expressions grim and hollow.

    Jura followed the dog in silence, the droning of the hollow ones acting like a grater on their mind. Desperate to break the low dirge around them, Jura spoke up again.
    “What’s your name?” It seemed simple enough. Perhaps the start to a conversation could distract them from their surroundings.

    “You can call me Druron,”

    “What kind of dog are you, Druron?”

    “Sheep dog,” Druron chuckled.

    Before Jura could ask what was so funny, both of them hit a branching fork in the road. Five paths; no signposts.

    “Well, what now?” Jura asked.

    1. I liked this story a lot.
      The idea of a “sheep dog” leading the dead through the Elysian Fields or whatever is pretty cool. The introduction of the dog was a little awkward, but I know the word limit means sacrifices need to be made.

      The idea that not making it through the fields in a day leaves you as a “hollow one” is interesting. I’m curious if the fork in the path is meant as a sort of test, or proof. Where people with good hearts will be able to pick the proper path and those without will find themselves looping back.
      I feel like I remember a big discussion about something quite like that but I can’t remember what it was about…

      Anyway, great idea, good visuals, and a cliffhanger ending.

  5. MysteryElement Avatar
    MysteryElement

    Nanna’s Gambit
    By MysteryElement (also in private)

    Nanna had always been odd. You could never tell when she was being serious or messing with you, and she LOVED messing with people. Even her funeral had been strange, with an empty open casket.
    My mother and aunts had been the easiest targets, and I had somehow become her partner in crime until the day she passed. Even now, really. After the Will reading, the lawyer had given me a set of keys saying, “your grandmother’s final request is that you are the only one permitted into the house until you find what these keys open.”

    My relatives were all anxious to go through the house, for one reason or another, so soon enough I was there. The first key opened the front door, but I was in no hurry. I wanted to secure anything sentimental before my family came. Even without trying, I soon found the small wooden box the second key opened. Inside were pictures of us, a small thumbdrive, and an open envelope. In the envelope was a checklist.

    Make peace with Brenda

    Hide silver

    Pick up eggs

    Place order with engravers

    End the feud

    Leave watermelon, Katie’s porch

    Find the Yellow Sign

    Paint doors black

    ‘Forgive Maxim’ had been crossed out and replaced with; Create Special Brownies for Maxim.

    Paint over the Monet

    Hide eggs

    Find that thumbdrive

    Don’t finish the pie
    P.s. Make new pie

    Plant shells and bells in garden

    Set the trap

    Etc.

    Each task had a checkmark, except for ‘Find that thumbdrive’ which only piqued my curiosity. Some items on the list were so scratched out that I still cannot make out what they had been. The list had been titled, ‘how to live forever’.

    A few days later, strange things started happening, and these occurrences are still happening, even today. When Nanna’s gravestone was set in place I could only smile. It read, ‘You Will Always Wonder if it was Me’ across the stone.

    Sure enough, Nanna still lives on to this day in all of our memories, willingly or not.

    1. I like it. It really sets the right tone for the story as a whole. I also like that the story had a naturally progression, lots of pieces of wonder, and leaves the reader with something to think about. A true tale… in the best storytelling sense. An excellent story with lots of fine elements packed nicely into a small space. Well done.

    2. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
      Arith_Winterfell

      I really enjoyed this story. Especially the list structure of the tale. Something about the list and it being “how to live forever” really gave flavor to story and setup things for the way Nanna planned to mess with people. I also especially liked the big reveal toward the end of the story with the tomb stone inscription reading “You Will Always Wonder if it was Me” really typifying the element of the trickster in the story. Had we had more room to do so, I would have been interested to see the “strange things” that happened after her “death.” and in a longer story see if she really was dead at all, or just hiding while pulling the strings on everybody with various pranks! All in all, a good story with a lot of potential to be expanded if you decide to do so.

  6. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
    Arith_Winterfell

    “Life, After Life”

    By Arith_Winterfell

    I had been prepared and born with implants that granted me telepathic abilities. But amidst the crowd of minds that I could hear on normal worlds, I had to maintain my distance to avoid invading others’ privacy. I remained alone in every crowd. I had chosen to join the Unity many years ago. I had felt lost and adrift in life, lonely and full of pain. So, I sought out the colony that was the home of the Unity on a distant world amidst endless stars. I joined them, and felt the fullness of being whole.

    We had been alone in the commons room, doing sweeping that had been needed. The steady chatter of the voices in our mind, the voices of the many. The Unity. We spoke as one. Shared our minds, and didn’t need to speak verbally among ourselves. We already knew each other’s thoughts and feelings implicitly. We could see everything. Feel everything. The voice of the whole. Not one, but all of us.

    Then quietly I felt myself becoming single and solitary in thought. It was no longer us. I was being addressed by the whole of the Unity. Such a change after all these years frightened me.

    “We have kept our deliberations silent from you. Now we have come to our inevitable conclusion. For this, we are sorry,” said the collective voice of the Unity in my mind.

    “Why have you done this?!” I pleaded.

    “We have calculated out a complex series of future events that, though not at your fault, will none the less bring destructive harm to the Unity due to your presence. For this reason, you must be exiled from the collective whole. We are sorry for this.”

    A cold shock came over me as I realized I was now in the silence of my own thoughts. I was severed from the whole once more. My life here had ended and who I had been had died. Now I have had to find my way once more in the cosmos, finding a new life after life.

    1. Calliope Rannis Avatar
      Calliope Rannis

      It’s quite a high-concept story this week! Definitely an interesting one for sure – usually hiveminds are all about adding more and more people to the collective mind, in order to strengthen and secure their position. So the idea that this hivemind ended up finding a reason to disconnect a single individual from the whole is an unusual thing to see, and raises many intriguing questions.

      That said, that same high-concept nature might have hurt the story a bit, simply because there was a lot that needed to be explained and described for the story to make sense as is. It makes for a quite dense text, without much room for flavour or focusing on the significance of the moment of severing itself. Maybe it could have been more effective if the story had entirely been about the moment of being severed from the Unity, with the lore behind it being more implied than explicitly stated?

      In any case, I do feel for this character’s situation. They just wanted to not be lonely anymore, and even their best possible option for avoiding that was ultimately rejected. I hope they find a better way to not be alone, with time. 🙂

  7. Chronicles of The Dragon: Edge of The Beyond
    By Makokam

    “Oh. Hold on. This one’s soul hasn’t left it’s body yet.”

    Mira walked across the battlefield to the corpse and began a rather complicated spell. To everyone else nothing seemed to be happening, but she saw the spirit rise reluctantly.

    “What’s going on?” it asked.

    “Well,” Mira said, “You and your friends attacked us. A few of you died. Including you.”

    “Oh.” It said, “Is that why I’m being pulled?”

    “That is the after-life calling you, yes. Why haven’t you gone?”

    “I don’t want to go…”

    Mira nodded, “That’s understandable. Lots of people choose to become ghosts.” She looked around at the ancient stone halls around them. “I don’t know if this is the place you want to haunt though. It seems pretty lonely. And I doubt any other ghosts here would be friendly.”

    “What… What is…the afterlife like?”

    “Oh, I’ve never been there. And any Angels I spoke to wouldn’t tell me. But I have spoken to a couple spirits from Heaven. They said it was like going home.”

    The soul was quiet for a bit, “What about the…other place.”

    “Oh, I know a lot about Hell. Hell is the food chain. You must eat or be eaten, assimilated into the bodies of stronger spirits, with all their hate, regret, and desire driving you all forward. Never able to rest. Never safe. Always hungry. And always burning.”

    The soul was silent and still for a long moment.

    “I don’t think I’d go to heaven.”

    Mira smiled, almost sympathetically, “I think I agree.”

    It didn’t sob. The emotion was too raw even for that. “I don’t want to go to Hell! I don’t want to stay here!”

    “Well, there is another option,” Mira said.

    “Wha-? There is?”

    “You can bind yourself to me. Become my servant.”

    “But I’ll get to keep living?”

    Another smile, this one kind of sad, “No. You’ll still be very much dead. You’ll continue as only a soul.”

    “I’ll be with you though? Not stuck here? Or in…”

    “Yes. You’ll be with me, wherever I go, and you’ll have to do anything and everything I say.”

    1. Well executed story line. Reminded me of Greg Stillson kicking the dog to death when no one is looking in The Dead Zone. Not a the story I would write… with one person making another a slave. And I like dark stories too. But there has to be room for all sorts of art. Even art that takes you where you don’t want to go.

      1. Ya know, I originally had the soul ask, “So I’d be a slave?” but as I wrote it just never got to that point. Was wondering if anybody would pick up on that issue.
        But to be fair…that soul was probably going to hell. So it really was up to it if they wanted to flip that coin. Or just bond itself to Mira.
        And for better or worse, it’s going to have a lot of friends as they travel.
        That said, kinda surprised you compared it to kicking a dog to death.
        Anyway, glad you liked it?

    2. Talk about a rock and a hard place. I do give props to Mira(who I suspect will eventually be known as Lady Death) for being honest about the situation. That he can either haunt a hostile place, go to Hell, or be a slave. Unless there was a fourth option, or haunting that area wouldn’t be as bad as she made it out to be.

      Either way, that is one Hell of a sucky choice, though Mira does at least appear to be kind, but… yeah I don’t buy that lol. Also I fully agree with you not actually using the word slave. It isn’t needed and you still completely get the idea of it across. You set this all up beautifully and its definitely one of those stories where the simplicity makes it shine. Well done!

      1. I hate to burst your bubble, because it’s a fun idea, but Mira and Lady Death (aka Keres) are very different people.
        Well, the soul can roll the dice and see if it goes to Heaven. Who’s to say just how strict the requirements are or aren’t?

        And haunting an ancient temple could be fun. Or peaceful. I dunno. Can it call your harvest goddess for a second opinion?
        So, Mira hasn’t appeared, but as for whether she’s kind or not… she has THOUSANDS of souls bound to her. Well, A thousand. …hundreds at least.
        lol
        I only say this because I have a really cool image in my head I can never show you.

        And thank you again. I’m glad you liked the story. I really want to expand this one so hopefully you’ll enjoy that too and I wont ruin it. lol

    3. i-prefer-the-term-antihero Avatar
      i-prefer-the-term-antihero

      Gahh I love this story. This is such a great use of the prompt, one that encompasses the different options a soul might have extremely well.

      ““Oh, I’ve never been there. And any Angels I spoke to wouldn’t tell me. But I have spoken to a couple spirits from Heaven. They said it was like going home.”
      The soul was quiet for a bit, “What about the…other place.”
      “Oh, I know a lot about Hell. Hell is the food chain. You must eat or be eaten, assimilated into the bodies of stronger spirits, with all their hate, regret, and desire driving you all forward. Never able to rest. Never safe. Always hungry. And always burning.”
      The soul was silent and still for a long moment.
      “I don’t think I’d go to heaven.”
      Mira smiled, almost sympathetically, “I think I agree.”
      –This part right here. I love it so much. I think it’s something about the simplicity of it.
      The angels don’t talk to me, but the spirits say it’s like going home…That feels about right.
      And “I know a lot about Hell” reminds me so much of one of my favorite song lyrics: “we don’t own our heavens now, we only own our hell.” I find it an interesting idea that we can’t know heaven, but we can know hell well. And I like how you didn’t just talk about fire, but rather left the fire image for the end when it would be powerful. “Never able to rest. Never safe. Always hungry. And always burning.”–this was especially great.
      The soul knowing it won’t go to heaven, and lamenting that fact…this whole sections feels like there’s such a simple truth to it, and I love it. And I can really see the way Mira smiles.

      And I love the option at the end. There’s a demented hope to it. None of the options presented are appealing to the soul, so she gives them a good option…yet, that has a catch too.

      This is such a great story. I love it. Crossing my fingers you’ll get read again!!

  8. Enter the Void

    Sarah J. Herbison

    “Come on in and sit down next to the fire. It must be freezing out in the void. Here, I’ll make us a nice cup of tea to ward off the chill.

    You must be wondering where you are and how you got here. Do you remember tending to the garden with your youngest grandchild in the hot sun? The glass of iced tea in front of you before the sun turned frigid?

    I know you’re in shock. Heatstroke is a sudden way to get here, but not the worst way, mind you. Your family loves you very much and is thinking of you now, but you have lived a long and full life, and it’s time to move on from this one.

    I hate to be the one to break this to you, but there is no heaven, no hell either, mind you, at least not in the way they taught you. When you are ready, you will move on to the next life. I hope you are as kind in the next life as you were in this one.

    Ah, what of evil people? Evil, or rather, misguided people, take far longer to move onto the next life. They spend eons wandering the cold and the dark before they ever find me. Some never do.

    You return to the world, and if you work to make it a beautiful place, eventually it will become a heaven or nirvana. However, if you fail to love each other or stop the evil of your world, I can see everything burning in the fire.

    It is a journey that never ends. Me, I’m only the caretaker of this void, tending the spirit until you return. So take your time, say goodbye to your family, you can return when you’re ready to move on.

    I wish you the best of luck when you do.”

    1. Excellent portrayal here given the title of “The Void.” There is a real disembodied quality to the narrative that separates the readers from having deep feeling about the characters, so it sets the perfect tone for the piece. Not naming anyone is also a nice touch and adds considerably to the ethereal and unearthly quality of the work.

      It has a near musical quality to it… sort of a tone poem, if you will. Because it isn’t a story of character or about character, per say, but of tone and theme.

    2. RVMPLSTLTSKN Avatar
      RVMPLSTLTSKN

      Tagback!

      Second person is a difficult tense to use well and I think it was an excellent choice for this piece. The piece is an neat iteration on reincarnation. I have to wonder if the viewpoint character is truly just a caretaker or another soul looking for that missing piece, looking to move on and finding it in helping the newly/recently deceased.

      I also liked the hints of a backstory you give the monologue’s beginning.

      Good job, Sarah!

    3. Jacob Alexander Avatar
      Jacob Alexander

      I was really fond of this one. I in particular love the decision to have the narrator talk directly to the reader, it’s a good way to build the emotional narrative of moving on, and makes for absolutely fun pacing.

  9. At the Start of the Journey (From Private)
    C. M. Weller

    Feah looked down at her body, knowing why she felt no fear at last. It had been a good life and the adults keeping watch turned away as her last breath rattled in her throat. They lit candles and lanterns, using mirrors to cast light into the shadows. She remembered doing that for her mother, but now… she could SEE the demons waiting to try and take her newly-freed spirit to pieces.

    Yet, she was unafraid. Of course. All the things she had to be afraid with were gently cooling on the bier she had died on. There would be at least four keeping the shadows away from the body while her spirit gained strength. They would not speak her name until the minor moon, Lady Sleep, hid once more behind the mother moon, Lady Night. Lady Sleep would have Feah’s soul by then, taking her from the mortal earth into the realms beyond, where she would be judged by the stars. That was some weeks away, yet.

    Those guarding her could not be pregnant, nor trying to become so. They could not risk her entering a new life and stifling the spirit of a child yet to be. That was a crime and would weigh heavy on her. So it was that her guardians would, and had to be, the men of the house.

    They were called in, lanterns already lit and aloft, swapping places with the too young and the too old who had stayed watch before. When the sun again dawned, the too old would come to wash her. They would dress her for the pyre in a simple shift. Where she was going, clothes would no longer be necessary.

    In a week, Lady Sleep would appear, both in the sky and by Feah’s side, to tell her all the things she must know before judgement. Then, as Lady Sleep journeyed behind her mother, Feah’s family would light a lantern from the pyre and set it into the sky. There, to become one with the stars, and guide generations thereafter.

    1. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
      Arith_Winterfell

      One things I really liked about this story was its mythology! The way it explores, not the afterlife itself, but the very beginnings of it. The way light must be kept around the body, how pregnant women aren’t allowed to keep watch, and the Lady Sleep and Lady Night elements of this world’s lunar system. To me all these features really made the world standout. We really don’t get a lot of the sense of who Feah was in life or of the people themselves as figures, but that is to be expected with a short word limit and a greater focus on world building. A really interesting and great story!

  10. Cheapdoc Avatar
    Cheapdoc

    New life
    By Cheapdoc

    Darzal had not made the best decisions in life, so when the judge marked him for execution and necromantic return, he was legitimately happy. He feared what was in the great beyond more than anything in life. The fate of one’s soul had been thoroughly explored already, and what awaited him wasn’t precisely a kind afterlife. What could have been better for a man like Darzal, than to return as a standard issue skeleton for a few centuries, and then fade into the wheel of reincarnation?
    When Darzal’s bones rattled back to life, he expected his sight to be fixed to his skull. No such luck. He saw his bones from a distance above, as though through a pinhole. His bones were now puppeted by necromancy and given menial tasks, away from the public’s eye. He never expected to have control over his undead limbs, but what he expected even less was the fate of his soul.
    A soul was a messy thing, made of two distinct sections, a thing that existed in the fringes of reality. Darzal moved their new being through a stream of memories and histories. They looked through and between perspectives, reflecting, understanding, pondering. Their intangible form shivered and quivered. It was not as bad as they expected in life; to weave and wane through memories and perspectives until they gained true understanding. However, there was something terrifying about their new existence they couldn’t put into thought.
    Darzal’s bones turned to dust back in the world, and they still hadn’t achieved reincarnation. They understood and lamented their mistakes, and wished with every fading fiber of their fading soul that they hadn’t made them. What barred them from new life was not their memories or mistakes, it was fear. Darzal came to understand that they hadn’t been afraid of death, and what was beyond, but of life and to start again.

    1. RVMPLSTLTSKN Avatar
      RVMPLSTLTSKN

      Tagback!

      This is a fun idea, Doc! It really brings forward questions of redemption in a world of magic and second chances. Great premise!

      Two critiques:
      Firstly, you’ll want to separate your paragraphs with an extra line for readability (per Benji).
      Secondly, don’t be afraid (hehe) to play with tenses. Usually a singular tense is suggestible, but in lines that are argumentative rather than descriptive—“a soul was a messy thing”—switching to present tense from past will make the assertion stronger. (“A soul is a messy thing…”)

      Good job Doc!!

      1. Cheapdoc Avatar
        Cheapdoc

        I appreciate the feedback. Yeah, I totally chickened out with the tenses, just bad college flashbacks. I’m glad you enjoyed the premise, I was wondering if it would read as too cynical or mean spirited. It’s probably too late to separate the paragraphs, but I will certainly do it next time. Thank you.

  11. berserker47 Avatar
    berserker47

    A Morbid Classroom
    by berserker47

    *Marenkiava, the teacher of the class, speaks to the students:*
    Sure, it isn’t easy to be dead.
    Yes Stardaraminev, it isn’t easy to be alive either, case in point.
    No, of course you can’t take things from your life with you to the afterlife, what did you expect?
    To be honest, mythologies don’t have any idea how hard it is to be dead.
    What, Vradnikalimav, you want to pee? Now? Can’t you sit down and listen for a second? Fine, go ahead.
    As I said. Mythologies don’t have aaaany clue at all. They all expect you to quietly go and search for the gates of hell or stairway to heaven, whatever. Or you stay in your place and some skeletal dude comes picking you up.
    Of course, Walmatreiv, that’s the truth, I just wanted to say that no one stays in place, they all just go on.
    Kostrimiiriv, did you even pay attention? We are *not* discussing Greek mythology right now. Yes, Thanatos would be the Greek equivalent to us. Dear Death, just shut up and listen!
    *sigh*
    So, dead souls just keep on living. How does a reaper notice whether a soul is dead or not? Well, dead souls don’t glow. However, some alive souls don’t glow either, and you need a lot of practice to notice the difference. Most souls just keep on doing what they did in life, working, eating, sleeping, or at least mimicking those things. Some souls notice when they are dead, and those are the troublemakers, they always cause chaos everywhere. If no reaper comes picking them up, they will go to some old, abandoned factory hall and scare the sh*t out of visitors, and once they do that, it is unlikely for any reaper to find them, because they officially started their own little afterlife.
    Daltarosnyav, what do you think you are doing? Would you mind putting your pencil out of Askradalmiovs eye socket?
    No, he doesn’t need it, but you could still leave him alone couldn’t ya?
    WE WILL NOT HAVE PRACTICAL LESSONS, HOW OFTEN DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT, BILLY?!?

    1. I love this. The dialogue between the reapers is grounded and hilarious. You have a great grasp of character. I would work to break up the paragraphs a bit more to make the piece easier to read.

      1. berserker47 Avatar
        berserker47

        oh no, it didnt come across that only one person speaks? Well, that’s bad, but thank you for the well-intentioned compliment! ^^

  12. Connor A. Avatar
    Connor A.

    Basic Ideas and Odd New Terms (Sword Isles)
    By Connor A.

    There was no feasible way for any Death to use facial expressions, yet Ambrosius could have sworn he saw Death’s eye sockets widen alongside the purple tear as souls leaked through.

    “Pay them no mind for now,” Ambrosius said, snapping Death out of his panic long enough to look at him. “Just focus on the recently deceased.”

    Death gave a reluctant nod, then nervously glanced at the tear before harvesting the soul from the body before them. His moves were more methodical than Ambrosius’, which was a feat in itself. Only when the soul stepped away from its body did Death finally ask, “Is it not a concern?”

    “This only happens near the end of each year to allow loved ones to see each other. It will not cause any undead.” Ambrosius knelt down and moved the rubble from the body’s face. He recognized them as a Wyld from Lord Dara’s domain and stifled a sigh.

    “What about necromancy, then?”

    The use of the term was enough to make Ambrosius look up at Death with a raised eyebrow. “Necro…mancy?”

    Death tensed. “The… reanimation of dead bodies? I was using the term until I could ask about it.”

    Ambrosius regarded him for a few more seconds before he motioned for Death to help him clear more rubble. As they worked, he answered, “If I am not mistaken about what you mean, most people refer to it as puppetry, though most people do not use corpses. Since the bodies are under a mortal’s control instead of a soul, this ‘necromancy’ as you called it cannot create true undead.”

    Once most of the rubble was cleared away, Ambrosius picked up the body and began making his way to Lord Dara’s domain.

    “Come. It is wise that we deliver their body for preparation.”

    Death caught up with Ambrosius and stayed silent the entire journey.

    Necromancy.

    Ambrosius almost grimaced. If Death was already like this, he feared what this era would bring.

    1. Cheapdoc Avatar
      Cheapdoc

      Interesting take on necromancy as a concept, and a really interesting story. I like it when the figure of death has strong personification and it’s kindda nice to see it bossed around a bit. Strong characterization on Ambrosius too. I find it interesting that he didn’t quite know what necromancy was, but got undeath quite well. I can see there’s things to explore there. Nice.

      1. Connor A. Avatar
        Connor A.

        Thank you! Figuring out if and how to include necromancy in this world was something that gnawed at me for a bit now because of how death and the undead work. The idea of it being a kind of puppetry situation is a new concept, so it’s good to see that it works.

    2. Interesting take on the prompt. I was almost expecting that it would be a soul new to the afterlife, but to me, this read like Death is the beginner to the afterlife here. Death still seems to hold the living in high regard and that last line really makes it seem like Death (or at least this version of him) is very new to all this.

      I like the dynamic between Death and Ambrosius. It’s almost a mentor-student type relationship. What is Ambrosius? Is he some higher being? Death’s predecessor? Either could make sense. Excellent showcase of Death’s nerves, by the way. I love how you describe the contortion of the skull at the very beginning.

      Well done!

      1. Connor A. Avatar
        Connor A.

        Thanks! Ambrosius is a god and Tris’ (this Death and the one who’s close to Marcos) predecessor, so both your presented options are correct. Since Death’s face is physically unreadable on account of being an unmoving skull, I always have a bit of pride when I describe Death’s emotional expressions in unique ways.

  13. Wooden Dolls are Wooden (Darkspell Universe)
    By Alex Nightingale (aka Spectre)

    Cynthia took a tentative step forward, her new wooden leg wobbling unsteadily on the crate, holding the Mercury logo: a silver M, surrounded by a red sphere.

    “This isn’t exactly easy to handle,” she reported, trying to remain steady.

    “It takes some getting used to,” Mia replied. “Try to move, as though you were walking with your original body.”

    “Yeah, I’ve been dead for months at this point. I’m a bit rusty.”

    “Oh, come on,” Konrad, Mia’s familiar and talking crow, interjected. “If Erls can do it…”

    “Erls spend their entire lives in trees,” Cynthia answered, falling over with a clatter. “Possessing a wooden doll is not as easy as it looks.”

    “Well,” Mia sighed. “It’s the best we can offer.”

    “Can’t you just, I don’t know, make some muscles or something?”

    “I’m a soul witch, not an ethereal engineer, Cynthia. Besides, I don’t have a lot of experience with… this. I’m only doing this as a favor for Daniel.”

    “I understand,” Cynthia hung her wooden head. “Still, thank you.”

    “Don’t mention it,” Mia said.

    “Please mention it,” Konrad interjected again. “I like being thanked.”

    “All you did was fetch puppet parts.”

    “And when you are tall enough to reach the top shelves without wings, you are more than welcome to ignore me for the rest of your days.”

    “Thank you, Konrad,” Cynthia said.

    “Ah, you see, Mia? A grateful customer.”

    “She’s not technically… You know what? Never mind.”

    Mia picked up Cynthia and looked at her from all sides, fiddling with her limbs.

    “Um… Mia? That feels really weird.”

    “I thought you were a ghost. Since when can you feel?”

    “I can’t, but… I still notice you, moving my limbs. Feels like I’m on strings.”

    “You’re a puppet,” Konrad commented.

    “Not helping, Konrad.”

    “Not trying to help,” he turned his back to Mia. “You were mean.”

    “What did I do!?”

    “You refused to acknowledge his efforts,” Cynthia laughed.

    “You… Ugh. Fine, gang up on the witch, trying to do you a favor.”

    “If you want to do me a favor, find something less wooden.”

    Mia couldn’t help but chuckle.

    1. Cheapdoc Avatar
      Cheapdoc

      Nice story. I liked the dynamic of the trio, they had really solid characterization. I like the idea of fetching a soul a tying it to a puppet or a golem as way of resurrection. Really enjoyed the little bits of worldbuilding, with the soul witch and the mention of ethereal engineers. Really fun read.

    2. Connor A. Avatar
      Connor A.

      I am so glad to see Mia being happy. As usual with stories centered around her, her dynamic with Konrad is stellar and brings extra joy to the moment. It was also really fascinating to have an idea of what her powers are and limitations to them. This was just a really good piece overall.

    3. Karl Aegnor Avatar
      Karl Aegnor

      Great characterization in this piece, it is easy to tell who is talking even when it is not explicitly stated. I also enjoy the diegetic worldbuilding (I’m not positive that’s actually a term, but I’m using it.) A lot about the setting is communicated in a natural feeling way through this rich dialogue. Great work.

    4. i-prefer-the-term-antihero Avatar
      i-prefer-the-term-antihero

      When I read the title, I can’t help but think “Thanks Moon Moon” XD

      This is such a cool, unique take on the prompt!! I like that you took it as a dead soul trying to have a new life. I wonder how and why and how she got into this situation. Why Cynthia wants this, how she met Mia, and why Mia decided to help her.
      I wonder who the Mercury company is too.

      ““Yeah, I’ve been dead for months at this point. I’m a bit rusty.”
      –Nice.

      ““I’m a soul witch, not an ethereal engineer, Cynthia. Besides, I don’t have a lot of experience with… this. I’m only doing this as a favor for Daniel.”
      –Interesting bit of Worldbuilding here!! And background for the story itself. I’m curious about both what an ethereal engineer is, and who Daniel is and his relation to them.
      Or, wait, is Daniel the one who’s a part of…uhh, I’m not remembering the name, Lady Carmine’s(?) family? The one with the briefcases?

      “Please mention it,” Konrad interjected again. “I like being thanked.”
      “All you did was fetch puppet parts.”
      “And when you are tall enough to reach the top shelves without wings, you are more than welcome to ignore me for the rest of your days.”
      “Thank you, Konrad,” Cynthia said.
      “Ah, you see, Mia? A grateful customer.”
      –I LOVE IT

      “Not helping, Konrad.”
      “Not trying to help,” he turned his back to Mia. “You were mean.”
      “What did I do!?”
      “You refused to acknowledge his efforts,” Cynthia laughed.”
      –KLLHHLKH fabulous.

      You do such a great job with these stories of making them stand alone, but also give me plenty of questions. I don’t feel confused or like I don’t have enough info…but I’m also curious to know more.

      I think Konrad is where this piece really shines XD He has such a fun voice. I can’t help but be reminded of Maleficent and Diaval here as well. I loved their interactions.

      I’d definitely be curious to read more, and learn more about what’s going here….

  14. RVMPLSTLTSKN Avatar
    RVMPLSTLTSKN

    When the Wanderer Met the Shaman
    By RVMPLSTLTSKN (The Saga of The Deep One’s Wake)

    “Come and sit by my fire, wanderer,” Jabil-Tai said. Xe watched the traveler survey xir companions before sitting. The traveler’s face was short and frame lean, her aged skin the color of stones in a riverbed. The traveler exuded a sense of presence and Tai knew she was the one.

    “It seems I’m not the only one wandering tonight,” the Wanderer said. The faces around her were nervous. “I have nothing to repay your generosity.”

    “Perhaps you can settle a debate for us?”

    The traveler cocked her head.

    “Can you define, for me, eternity?” Tai quoted.

    “How can I define what has no beginning and no end?” The Wanderer answered.

    “Perhaps you can tell us what you are then. Your eyes speak of foreignness and I sense you have big medicine.”

    “You are a shaman?”

    “We are all shamans.”

    The Wanderer looked each of them over again. “You must be hunting.”

    Tai felt the last remnant of Hope rustle in xir breast. “There is a spirit killing children. We are looking to make peace.”

    “How would you do that? By inviting it to sit by fure?”

    “By helping it excise that part of its personality.”

    The Wanderer sat quiet and Tai wondered if she would eat.

    “Do you know which is the greater sin, shaman? To reject home or long for it with every breath?”

    “To reject it,” Tai said, but something in the Wanderer’s gaze made xir unsure.

    “You are older than I, do you remember that Day?”

    Tai did. Xe remembered the weirding call, the pull on the identity of every spirit.

    “The greater sin is to falsely reject home, then long for it,” the Wanderer said.

    Tai didn’t need to hear more and drew on that last remnant of Hope. “I banish you, wandering spirit. No more will you come to our places or murder our children.”

    The Wanderer didn’t move, held by the unanswered question. She chuckled and dread crept among the shamans. “Eternity isn’t such a grand thing. There are a thousand that can be lived each day.” The question answered, the Wanderer left them.

    1. Cheapdoc Avatar
      Cheapdoc

      I like the idea behind this one. I like the idea of a group of shamans luring a wandering spirit to have a conversation and exorcise it, if needed. I really liked your use of pronouns, it helped reinforce the identity of the character quickly, it was well done. It might have just been me, but I wondered at the beginning of the story if it was meant to be read from the traveler’s perspective or from Tai. It might have been intentional too, I wasn’t too sure, but I didn’t dislike it. All in all, pretty interesting.

      1. RVMPLSTLTSKN Avatar
        RVMPLSTLTSKN

        That’s probably due to the fact that I took an omniscient perspective this time. It’s less closely tied to a specific character. I’ve written pieces for both characters in the past, so splitting the difference seemed like a good idea.

    2. I really like how this hints at Eastern Philosophy. I love the questions the piece asks, what is eternity? This is a fresh take on the ghost hunter, exorcism story and I hope to see more.

    3. i-prefer-the-term-antihero Avatar
      i-prefer-the-term-antihero

      I like this one both more and less than your other piece for this week. I really really like their dialogue and philosophical discussion a lot here. …But I’m also genuinely very unsettled to hear that she’s killing children.

      “her aged skin the color of stones in a riverbed.” Was an interesting line. For me it brings to mind skin of an inhuman grey, almost corpse-ish, or statue-like. Definitely befitting a goddess (or whatever she is) who’s become cold and heartless. I can’t tell if this is a result of her godhood (or whatever she is). Do people change physically when they become gods/spirits/whatever?
      Or is this what her skin normally looks like and I have a totally wrong image? XD

      “ It seems I’m not the only one wandering tonight,” the Wanderer said. The faces around her were nervous. “I have nothing to repay your generosity.”
      —I liked the cadence of this.

      “Can you define, for me, eternity?” Tai quoted.
      “How can I define what has no beginning and no end?” The Wanderer answered.
      “Perhaps you can tell us what you are then. Your eyes speak of foreignness and I sense you have big medicine.”
      “You are a shaman?”
      “We are all shamans.”
      —this was a great conversation.

      “Tai felt the last remnant of Hope rustle in xir breast. “There is a spirit killing children. We are looking to make peace.”
      “How would you do that? By inviting it to sit by fure?”
      “By helping it excise that part of its personality.”
      —Tai seems like a kind person. Xir trying to make peace and talk to her instead of just trying to punish her. I really like that. It’s interesting how Klajonas picks up on the fact that it’s her Tai is referring to so easily.
      I really like the line “by helping it excise that part of its personality.”
      At first I read it as “exercise” as in exercise the kind part of its personality that is willing to sit peacefully by the fire. But excise the part of its personality that is killing children is great too. I like that xir able to see good in her, that there’s more to her.
      Also, small nitpick, you spelled “fire” as “fure.”

      “Do you know which is the greater sin, shaman? To reject home or long for it with every breath?”
      “To reject it,” Tai said…
      “The greater sin is to falsely reject home, then long for it,” the Wanderer said.”
      —was a fascinating bit of info. I’m assuming she’s referring to herself, that she rejected home and then longed for it. But I can’t help but wonder, a) why didn’t/doesn’t she just…go home? She’s realized now she wants to, she can still do so as a god, couldn’t she? Or would Father eat her because of his dream of the city being monotheistic? …What a horrifying thought. b) why does this philosophy cause her start killing children? And c) why is it that line that makes Tai lose hope? I don’t really understand the connection.
      I liked Tai’s banishment line a lot though.

      “Eternity isn’t such a grand thing. There are a thousand that can be lived each day.” Is an interesting line, and one I would have really liked hearing from another character…but it’s hard to allow myself to like, agree with and think “interesting philosophy” about the words of a child murderer, smirked smugly as she leaves. I’m afraid to say I think this knowledge of what she becomes has quite tainted my perception of Klajonas from here on out.

      I’m wondering if perhaps I’m learning how it feels to read my Peter Pan stories…

      I do like Tai a lot though, and would be curious to read more about xir.

  15. Calliope Rannis Avatar
    Calliope Rannis

    The Next Step Of A Long Path (Corespace Universe)
    By Calliope Rannis

    A rush of light. A distant song. And Nebella had arrived.

    She was in the grove again, with its rainbow of flowers, the hum of insects, and the beautiful blue spring at the centre. She’d been here many times before, both here and in ‘real life’ – though the latter had never been the same since the spring became polluted. But in the Better World, the grove never changed, never faded, never died. Just like it was in her childhood.

    In some ways, Nebella was disappointed that everything felt the same. But it also comforted her. The World that she had grown to love hadn’t changed. The only difference was that she could stay here now. No need to leave.

    “Nebbie!” A bright voice called.

    She looked up to see the familiar figure of her redheaded friend running through the spring towards her, sending gleaming water drops flying. Nebella managed to stand up, just in time to be nearly toppled over in a massive hug. She hugged her back, almost as tightly.

    “Nebbie…” her friend’s muffled voice repeated, head buried into her shoulder.

    Nebella’s hand ran through those ginger locks, marvelling at how soft they felt. “Dustie.” She softly replied.

    They embraced for a long moment, before coming apart a little to look each other in the eyes, their hands still holding each other’s arms.

    “So, you’re here for good now?” Dustie asked.

    “For good.” Nebella warmly smiled.

    Dustie smiled in turn, her eyes moist and shining. “Did you tell anyone? That you had decided, I mean.”

    “I told my family. They took it…well enough. I think they already knew this was coming.”

    “That was brave. I wish I had told mine before I left. Told you, for that matter.”

    Nebella gently squeezed her arms. “I forgave you a long time ago.”

    Dustie’s smile widened. “I know.”

    A pause, before the new arrival turned to look beyond the grove. “So. How do I travel around here? Never had to do that by myself before.”

    Dustie took her hand in hers, face beaming. “I can show you. Just follow my lead!”

    1. Connor A. Avatar
      Connor A.

      Using your sci-fi world for this prompt was an interesting and welcome choice. Your descriptions for this piece really sold an afterlife feel to this Better World, and the subtle establishment of this being a thing people know about and often have mixed feelings about it was a nice touch. Great job as always.

      1. Calliope Rannis Avatar
        Calliope Rannis

        Thank you Connor. I am glad you liked the descriptions and details! ^w^

    2. This is such a heartwarming story! The way the Better World is described just brings a smile to your face. It’s the kind of afterlife that you’d hope is true. And then there’s the worldbuilding hints on top of that as well. Like how has Nebella been here enough that it was asked if she was here to stay? And it definitely seemed like this was a decision as opposed to something that could just happen. It makes it all the more intriguing. Great take on the prompt! Loved it!

    3. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
      Arith_Winterfell

      I really enjoyed (and was in part also inspired) by the “heavenly” atmosphere of the story. The restored spring and the rushed embrace of Dustie was heart-warming! For the central conflict of the story being the difficult decision of whether or not to tell one’s loved ones you are making the decision to “move on” to the next life as being part of the “better world” makes for an interesting exploration of the concept beginning one’s afterlife. It is also an interesting take in general of the afterlife, it being not a literal afterlife, but a transition (in this example to the “better world”) to a different state by way of the plant organism in your setting. I understood really clearly what was going on, though I must admit that is partly due to having read your previous story about the plant being, so I was sort of prepared more for what was going on, but that’s really more a bonus for reading your other tales!

    4. What an oddly dark twist for an otherwise sweet story.

      I do like the take on the “Beginner’s Guide” part.

      The very slow drop of the hammer was interesting. I’m also kind of curious about the…mechanics of how this works.

    5. Jacob Alexander Avatar
      Jacob Alexander

      The description really brought this one to life, it was wonderful. It reads as though you’re very comfortable writing in your world and, if that’s the case, it was an inspired choice—as Connor also said.

      1. Calliope Rannis Avatar
        Calliope Rannis

        Thank you very much. I am quite comfortable writing for this universe by now, and it can go in a load of different directions and locations/characters, which makes the setting great for prompt stories! ^w^)

  16. Don’t Call Me Ma’am
    By Marx

    Despite the cold, endless void Matt found himself in, he was weirdly calm. Even then, he knew on some level he REALLY shouldn’t be here. But that feeling only raised the question…

    “Where IS here?” He muttered into the void.

    “You have, as all eventually do, found your way into my realm.” A female voice echoed from all directions.

    Two large, white rings cut through the infinite darkness that Matt recognized as the irises of very large eyes. “And you are…?”

    The irises began to shrink as a head and eventually a body took form, though it was still large enough to tower over him like a statue. “You need not play coy with me. All know who I am.”

    Matt exhaled deeply. “Am I… dead?”

    Death’s lips appeared as she smirked. “Yes. And no.”

    “Look… I imagine you get this a lot, but… I have people who are depending on me. I can’t die. Not yet…”

    “You are correct.” Death sighed. “I do get that a lot. Frankly, there are not many who meet me and… live to tell the tale, as it were. But of those, none have been in my realm and left.”

    “Any chance you can… make an exception for me? I was told that we were the same… um… race?”

    Death’s form shrank again, more details being filled in as she did so, giving her enough body definition that he could now differentiate between her hair and her clothing, both of which had, until now, been the same shade of black as the void. She currently stood slightly shorter than Matt, himself. It made her no less intimidating. “Yes. We are… connected. And we always will be. As such… you, and ONLY you, may enter and leave my realm as you wish.”

    Matt blanked for a moment. The way Death purred the word ‘connected’ made him uncomfortable. “Thank y-”

    “I allowed you to take from me once. As a gift.” The added detail of Death’s face made her glare somehow even more terrifying. “I will not allow it again.”

    “Yes Ma’am…” Matt squeaked out.

    1. Calliope Rannis Avatar
      Calliope Rannis

      Oooh! This is Matt’s first meeting with Death! That’s something that’s very cool to see, since obviously in all the other cases she’s just been a known entity and all. I really like seeing what Matt’s first naive impression of her was. (Especially that the poor guy doesn’t realise the ‘destined boyfriend’ thing yet. Though the vibe is there from the start of course. XD)

      I also super liked how Death’s ‘intro’ starts out as massive, bodiless eyes, before slowly shrinking and detailing down into something resembling a humanoid form. Though I wonder, is the humanoid form her ‘true’ form, or is it just a more comprehendable shell to wear than the truth of her infinite abyssal self? And I also wonder what Matt ‘took’ from her in whatever lead up to this scene…

      Great story Marx! 😀

    2. Damn. Used up his only free Rez without even realizing it.

      Honestly, I really look forward to seeing Matt demonstrate the kind of powers Death has. … Is she just “Death” or is that a title and she has a name outside of it?
      Might need to abandon his humanity or something before he can become a void. lol

      The image of her being so big she WAS the place and then slowly shrinking down to be shorter than Matt was really neat. Was that her “normal” or “original” form, or is that just her preference, compared to Matt?

      This was great. Love the interactions between them. Especially her uh…shall we say “enjoying” having him all to herself for the first time.

Leave a Reply to Makokam Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *