Writing Group: Can’t Rain All the Time

Cheer up, Meteorologists and Storm Chasers!

Quite a downpour we’ve been having lately, huh? Don’t worry; we’ll walk in the sun again soon, because…

This week’s Writing Group prompt is:

Can’t Rain All the Time

RULES AND GUIDELINES BELOW!
Make sure you scroll down and read them if you haven’t! You may not be eligible if you don’t!

This prompt comes from the movie The Crow. “It can’t rain all the time” is from the protagonist, Eric’s, band. He quotes this to Sarah, a street kid he used to look after, to identify himself. This optimistic ideal characterizes Eric’s worldview before he’s brought back as a revenant one year after he and his fiancée were murdered. The two loved each other and had a bright future ahead of them. While his motive throughout the film is revenge, Eric still possesses that idealism deep down that one day the metaphorical rain will stop.

Funnily enough, this saying has made its way into popular culture well enough that knew it, despite not knowing of the movie when it was picked. Many of you might have heard it too. It’s the idea that “things won’t be bad forever” when it seems like they will be. Usually I’ve seen it applied when a character is feeling down for one reason or another, and another is trying to cheer them up, telling them that things will get better. 

It’s a really nice mantra in this way too. So many things one could say in this context are either unhelpful or untrue. “Chin up” or “It’s not the end of the world” often are quite dismissive and unhelpful. And, as for “It’ll be okay” or “Things’ll get better” well…unfortunately, one doesn’t know if that’s true, one can only hope so. But “It can’t rain all the time”? That is true. Even in places where it rains almost year round, it still doesn’t rain forever. Even in the world of the movie, where the world was supernaturally dreary, it still didn’t last forever. The same is true for the bad things in our lives.

In this use of the prompt, it could be interesting to consider which perspective you want to tell the story from. What would bring a character to the point where they feel like nothing will ever get better? And, on the other side, how might another go about cheering them up; what would bring them to the conclusion that it won’t last forever? Do they succeed in cheering them up, or does the first character run off saying ‘You don’t understand!’? 

You could also apply the mantra more like the character in the movie does. He’s maintaining a positive attitude, despite the dreadful situation he’s in. Maybe your character is able to stay optimistic and cheer themselves up. How do they do this? Perhaps you want to delve into their psyche, and/or show the effect they have on the world around them. I’ve been watching Ted Lasso lately, and Ted is a prime example of how someone who (almost) always maintains a positive attitude. This positivity affects everyone around him (usually in good ways). But this isn’t necessarily easy. Watching this show, it highlights to me the fact that I haven’t seen a whole lot of characters who are like this, and how real people like that are even rarer. I would be curious to see how you all might write a character of this sort. 

You could also take the prompt in a much more literal direction. The prompt makes me think of kids inside the house, staring at the rain outside the window, groaning that they’re bored. A parent might walk by saying “It can’t rain all the time. It’ll let up eventually.” Often with these scenes, however, it’s what the kids do inside that becomes far more interesting. Think of the scene in Narnia where they’re bored in the rain and decide to play hide and seek…something that sets their life in a completely new direction. 

Another way you could apply that idea is by having your characters go out and play in the rain. It can’t rain all the time, true, but maybe your characters can learn to enjoy the rain anyways. Maybe there is good to be found in even the darkest situation. 

“Rain” could mean different things. Maybe you want to write about sun showers, where the sun is out while it’s raining. Maybe you want to write about freezing rain, or acid rain—something that could seriously harm you if you went outside. It could be something like the sludge falling from the sky and corrupting the Zoras’ domain in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. You could go the Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs direction and write about the strange circumstances that could cause things like food to rain down. What about fantasy worlds and alien planets? What sort of rain occurs there is limited only by your imagination. 

However, considering this has become a saying that means “Things won’t be bad forever” you could even play with different kinds of weather than rain. Back where I used to live in Seattle, “It can’t rain all the time” was certainly the apt phrase. But here, in Texas, “It can’t be sun all the time” would be the more fitting idiom. Perhaps you could play with this sort of thing. What other weather could be the “bad” that will eventually end? How could you still make the prompt clear while using a different weather phenomenon? 

Other things could symbolically act as rain. A leaky faucet could feel like a constant rain. A waterfall could be like rain (though waterfalls do generally rain all the time, so I’d be curious to see how you might use this one. Perhaps the troll living beneath it believes the rain will eventually stop, not realizing it’s a waterfall that won’t?). One of my personal favorite images is equating tears to rain—like in Fullmetal Alchemist when Roy Mustang’s friend dies and he says it’s a terrible day for rain, even though it isn’t raining, signifying that he’s crying. 

My first challenge is a simple one. Last week there was a lot of introspection going on, and my challenge related to it. This prompt is one that could easily be introspective too. My challenge is to not use introspection! Last week we explored how to make introspection interesting. This week, why not explore using devices other than introspection to convey the emotion you want?

My other challenge is to use onomatopoeia somewhere in your story! In a story about rain, “plinks” and “plonks” and “dribbles” are all fair game. Help us to feel more grounded in the scene with the onomatopoeia(s) you use! 

Remember, these challenges aren’t mandatory! They are meant to be a fun bonus if you’d like to have a little extra challenge. But, if you don’t want to use them, please don’t feel obligated to!

Look at that. The storm let up! Just like I told you it would. Now we just need to get out of these wet clothes.

—Pearce & Kaylie 

Remember, this is part of our weekly Writing Group stream! Submit a little piece following the rules and guidelines below, and there’s a chance your entry will be read live on stream! In addition, we’ll discuss it for a minute and give you some feedback.

Tune into the stream this Saturday at 3:00pm CST to see if you made the cut!

The whole purpose of this is to show off the creativity of the community, while also helping each other to become better writers. Lean into that spirit! Get ready not just to share what you’ve got, but to give back to the other writers here as well.

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Comments

109 responses to “Writing Group: Can’t Rain All the Time”

  1. oops idk how to delete posts

  2. When The Rain Comes Down (Chronicles of The Dragon: Berri)
    By Makokam

    “Uh… Can I hide under here with you?”

    “Hmm? Well, I wouldn’t call it hiding, but sure.”

    “What would you call it?”

    “Waiting.”

    “Waiting?”

    “Yeah. I’m not afraid of the rain. If it goes on too long I’ll go out get to where I need to go. I just don’t want to get wet. So, for now, I’m waiting.”

    “I…think I’m afraid of getting wet.”

    “Haha. Yeah, getting wet is always worse when you don’t have a warm dry place to go, or clothes to change into. I could show you my favorite shelter. Sometimes they even have new clothes to give out.”

    “You have a favorite shelter?”

    “Yeah… I may be biased because there’s a lady there who’s always nice to me. It’s still a nice shelter though. It’s been a lifesaver since I lost my home.”

    “I was thrown out.”

    “Oh… That’s terrible. I can’t quite relate. My wife left me, and I lost the house in the divorce. I was able to rent a nice apartment, but then I lost my job, and between the alimony and rent, my savings disappeared before I could get a new job.”

    “Do you have a job now?”

    “I do! … Kinda. I signed up with a place that provides labor on a day to day basis. It doesn’t pay much, and some days there’s no job. But I’ve been able to take some classes online at the shelter and a library. So hopefully I can get a new job and start supporting myself again.”

    “I’ve… never had a job. I keep getting bounced around. I found a way into a church tower though. I’ve been sleeping there.”

    “Well, it’s good you have a place to go, but the priests would probably let you stay in the church if you really needed it, or at least shown you to a shelter.”

    “I don’t like staying at shelters… I don’t want people to know where I am.”

    “Ah. I’ve met a few people like that. Life can really beat down on you sometimes. But as they say, can’t rain all the time.”

  3. berlingrabers Avatar
    berlingrabers

    Great

  4. MasaCur Avatar
    MasaCur

    Moving On
    By MasaCur

    Nick arrived on the twenty-third floor, and made his way to the Solvent Communications office.

    “Hello, Security.”

    “Ooh, it’s my personal security guard!” Amy called back.

    Nick smiled and shook his head. For some reason, Amy always called for him specifically to escort her to her car when she was working late. His coworkers questioned this, but it was a perfectly innocent arrangement. She must have found him trustworthy

    Truthfully, he didn’t mind. Amy was funny and pretty. Almost as pretty as Molly had been.

    “All finished?”.

    Amy stretched and nodded. “Yeah, the firewall update is compiling. Hopefully nothing goes wrong. I’d hate to have to come back tomorrow to fix it.”

    “You have plans, I take it? Hot date?”

    Amy smirked. “More like D&D with the girls.”

    Nick felt his thought train grind to a halt. Amy didn’t look like the kind of girl that would play Dungeons and Dragons. On the other hand, she didn’t look like the type with an IT job either.

    “What about you?” Amy asked. “Plans for tomorrow night?”

    “Working.”

    Amy’s nose crinkled. “You’re always working. Seriously, I work late two times a month, and not once have you ever been off shift when I called.”

    “It keeps me busy.”

    Amy’s nose crinkled more. “Sounds like you’re avoiding something. What’s wrong?”

    Nick felt a wave of grief flood over him, thinking of Molly losing control of her car. His jaw shuddered.

    “Nick, did I say something wrong?”

    Nick took a deep breath. “Sorry. I’m just…I, uh, I don’t get out much since my…wife…died.”

    “I’m sorry. How long ago was that?”

    Nick blinked away tears. “Um, fourteen months last Friday.”

    Amy shook her head. “That doesn’t sound like you’re just doing this to keep busy. It sounds like you’re trying to avoid dealing with your loss.”

    “I…”

    “No. Nick, you’re going to phone in sick tomorrow, and I’ll skip D&D. And I’m taking you out to dinner.”

    “There are rules against me socializing with an office tenant.”

    Amy got a mischievous grin on her face. “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

    1. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      Well, I’ve already made some comments on this one elsewhere, but I think they are worthy repeating, and I really liked the story, so let me elaborate a little on what I liked about this one.

      I really appreciate the flow and build up of the story. It is a very subtle story about a very dramatic feeling and emotion, and I really appreciate how it is slowly presented in an organic matter. Each character has a distinct voice, and they are presented, as well as all the context, in a very satisfying way. This is specially noticeable considering it is such a short story – there is a lot to unpack in very few words, and it does not feel rushed or mechanical. Everything here is pretty well-built.

      I also really like the way you took the prompt. Using the more metaphorical turn of the phrase and not once referring to actual rain makes it distinct of most of the other stories these weeks – it is very refreshing to read yours after going through others.

      I really liked that one. Very well-written, and the concept is pretty solid. It works amazingly. Thanks for sharing!

    2. Despite one of the characters going through grief it’s a cute little story. Only critique I have and it’s very minor I had to read the beginning part twice where he was announcing security has arrived for Amy. Again very minor and I can see how it plays out it still works here I just had to read at least twice to figure how he announced he arrived to Amy.

  5. J. J. Peterson Avatar
    J. J. Peterson

    The Rainy Days
    J. J. Peterson

    The window fogged beneath the caress of Jane’s breath, the warm comforting air from the fire inside confronting the outside air, cooled by a heavy rain. It had been raining almost all weekend and Jane was mad. Her family rarely went up to their cottage, no more than twice a year, and those were the only times to see Jamie. But she’s miserable playing on the rocks or wading through the stream when she’s wet, for even her best raincoat can’t seem to keep out the drench that soaks into her very bones, and her best friend Jamie can’t keep her happy when the suns gone. And so Jane was left with nothing to do but look out the window and watch the raindrops make splashes in the puddles.

    Behind her by the fire her older siblings roared with fun in the middle of a chaotic game of risk. Jane set her lip, refusing to pout. She wasn’t allowed to play, because she ‘was only 7’. Jane understood the game just fine though, it was much like her games with Jamie. You go on adventures to foreign lands and conquer them. She was quite good at it and Jamie often ended up in her dungeons. She always let him out though and eventually he’d become her king and they’d reign both their kingdoms happily. In the sun. It was hard to rule a kingdom when all your subjects were hiding from the rain.

    Her dad was reading a book in the kitchen, reading glasses pulled low on his nose, frowning at the tiny script. Jane couldn’t read yet, but she understood what reading was like. Her mom had told her it was like exploring the world from your reading chair. Well, Jane didn’t much like sitting in a reading chair, but exploring she knew lots about. Jamie and her often would sail ships to remote islands or ride wagons to far off countries. She understood reading, but she didn’t much see the point in it. Living it was much better as far as she could tell.

    So, she sat watching the rain. It smeared the window blurring her view of the outside world. That didn’t bother her though, she knew about that. What bothered her was that she couldn’t play with her friend, couldn’t conquer, couldn’t explore. She was left with memories and crude reconstructions of the good life of the sunny days.

    1. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      This is a great exploration on boredom, and how it feels like to be stuck at home during the rain as a child. I really like this take on the prompt.

      This is such a simple premise, and very well executed. I have the impression that this conjunction of well-executed simple premises is one of the hardest things to do in a story, and here it is done beautifully. Each small glimpse and thought that Jane’s share with us through the story shows us how much the boredom tires her, how much she feels like the world is currently closed to her (with all the activities the others are engaging one not available to her due to a lot of possible explanations) and how rich is her imagination. We at once engage in her boredom and marvel at her inner world – I’d say that, although she would much rather be outside playing, we can see how even while stuck at home she keeps exploring.

      This was a lovely story. Thanks a lot for sharing it.

  6. Eleni and the Water Nymph
    By Koryan

    “When’s it gonna rain!”

    Eleni’s mom shuffled boxes and cans across the counter.

    “Honey, I’ve told you it can’t rain all the time.”

    “I wanna see Plip again.”

    “Well, you can play with her now.”

    “Nooo, I can only play with her when it’s raining.”

    “Well honey, you’ll have to wait.”

    Kraak…

    …Boom!

    Zah zah

    Eleni shot up from the couch, eyes widen.

    “Plip!”

    “Oh no you don’t,” the mother grabbed Eleni’s arm whose body moved on her own towards the door.

    “But mom!”

    “It’s thundering and battering outside. Once it’s pitter-pattering then you can go, for now, you’ll have to stay inside.”

    Eleni crumpled into herself, “Ok.”

    Eleni woke to the sounds of the plink, plank, plunk, droplets of rain dropping onto the windowsill.

    Her eyes widen once again, the sun shining, rainbows forming, but more importantly, “it’s raining!”

    She hopped off the couch haphazardly throwing on her rain boots, raincoat, and hat onto her messy hair.

    “Don’t wander off too far, dinner will be done soon!”

    “Ok!” Eleni shouted back just before the screen-door slammed shut.

    Clomp-clomp, thunk Eleni’s footsteps echoed off the deck and rustled into the grass.

    The misty rain tickled Eleni’s face.

    Splish! Splash! Eleni sloshed through the puddles.

    Eleni’s hands cupped around her mouth, “Plip! Plip, come out and play with me!”

    A single raindrop stopped midfall hovering right before Eleni’s eyes. It wiggled in a circle attracting other raindrops into itself until it shaped itself into a girl.

    Plip, went the tiny nymph as she released a droplet from one hand and let it fall into the other. She did that many times as Eleni giggled each time the noise occurred.

    The two played hide-and-seek as the rain slowly starting to seize it’s misty assault on the world and the sun sinking quietly behind the trees.

    Plip tilted her head as they heard Eleni’s mother shouting.

    “Play with me…” pools of tears streamed down Eleni’s face, “…again some time.”

    Don’t fret child, we’ll meet again. Plip’s voice echoed as she slowly dissipated into the air returning from whence, she came, leaving Eleni behind

    1. What an amazingly cute story Koryan!

      Elani putting two and two together with the thunderstorm is brilliant. I can imagine how her eyes lit up at the sound. So good.

      The onomatopoeia you used for the storm ( Kraak and Zah Zah) were a bit confusing on the first read-through. Thought that Elani might have just sprinted across the room knocking everything over. Also felt like a time skip happened to take us to the storm, but it wasn’t 100% clear. Not super a problem, Loved your piece. Keep em coming!

  7. Reinkarnitor Avatar
    Reinkarnitor

    How to love rain

    by Reinkarnitor

    Big drops of water clashed against the front window of the “Agency X”. It ran down the glass like little streams, which were then immediately replaced by the next drops. A constant ‘pitter patter’ filled the room.

    Right at the glass front sat the ghostly girl Emma. She watched the downpour with her usual nonchalant attitude.

    The only thing other than the sound of the rain, which could be heard, was the clicking of a typewriter, used by Nia, the assistant of X, who just wrote down her summary of the last case.

    “Rain…” Emma suddenly sighed, and Nia stopped her work, looking at the other young woman.

    “What about it?” she asked with a smile.

    “Nothing…I just…I have seen a lot of it ever since I became the guardian of this city.”

    Nia chuckled.

    “Well, this IS London. I could not name any other city, where rain has become such a fundamental part of how people see it.”

    “More like bad weather in general…” Emma murmured.

    Nia raised an eyebrow.

    “Emma…could it be that rain makes you gloomy?”

    The ghost did not answer, but her facial expression, which surprisingly changed at the question, told Nia all she had to know.

    “The great guardian, depressed by a bit of rain.”

    “That’s not funny!”

    “Sorry, sorry. You’re right. I just wanted to mess with you.”

    The silver haired girl smiled and kept typing. But after a few minutes she looked at Emma again.

    “You know…I love the rain” she told the ghost.

    Now it was Emma who raised an eyebrow.

    “It may seem gloomy at first…but it is somewhat calming. Especially if you spent a rainy day in a warm cozy place, with a person you love.”

    Emma’s expression lit up as Nia said this.

    “A person I love…” For a second she seemed to think. “You are right.”

    With these words the ghostly guardian of London softly levitated away through the door of X’ office.

    “X, cuddle me!” her voice could be heard, followed by a surprised gasp of the detective.

    Nia chuckled.

    Seems like rain has stopped.

  8. Rainhunter (not a submission, couldn’t shorten it enough… 80 words too many!)

    By Vex

    KA-THOOM!!

    The familiar crack of thunder rockets through my ears, shocking my eyes open. My drowsy eyes showing me the dead alleys of downtown. The torrential rain refused to yield and beat its way through the crumbling concrete structures below my perch. Crouched in the only dry spot left of the old office tower, I fumble through my supplies, searching for a smoke. Eliminating the musty stench of the office with a long drag on my cigar, I do a rough check on my rifle. Hellfire was a model M24A3 SWS sniper rifle and is the reason I have survived so many jobs. She is as reliable as they come, good enough to easily blast a target from more than 800 yards away. It was the perfect weapon for the job.

    Out of the corner of my eye, I notice some movement. It was about 300 yards from my position, and took a form similar to a telephone pole, only stretched and distorted, like a piece of chewed up gum. Orbs of yellow phosphoresce dancing through its gelatinous body, snapping with fire each time they collid with its surroundings. This floating monstrosity was named Ouros because of the never-ending rain it’s surrounded in. The only discernable feature of an Ouros is in its head. That is where its core, a translucent marble, resided. That was my target. Lying prone, I hold Hellfire up to my eye and wait.

    The Ouros continues its meandering, until it reaches 100 yards from me. Its entire being freezes, and wanders up, leaving a trail of flames in its wake. Reaching my elevation, it feels the air until suddenly its lights turn bright red. Its orbs shake violently making its liquid boil and drip to the streets below, igniting flames wherever it touches. Roaring the rain away, it rushes me with speeds a cheetah could only dream to match. A cold chill stabs through my gut, ripping my breath from me. I almost forget to aim, as it speeds in front of me. I whip Hellfire towards the only dark spot in its body and pull the trigger.

    Ka BLAM!

    A white fire leaps out of Hellfire towards the heavens, shattering the Ouros into particles of fire landing all around me. The rainclouds part letting the city breath for the first time in years. The warmth of the sun quells my goosebumps, and I finish off my cigarette to celebrate the warmth. Breathing out, I crush out my smoke and wonder aloud “Can’t rain all the time, Eh?”

    1. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      Interesting tale, Vex.

      First of all, let me take a small recomendation out of the way – for future submissions, I’d recommend using a more compact header for the submission – look the others to see how we usually do it (First line with the title, then second line without a separation with author, then a separation and the story starts – and a line of separation between each paragraph). Most of your formating is alright, but you used a line of separation between title and author, and I believe that can confound the bot that sort the stories to be read.

      Ok, now after all that, really interesting tale. I’d say the best part of it is the descriptions, both of the creature and ambient, but specially of the action. I’m not overly fond of action scenes, but your choice of words for the narrative certainly was an engaging one, even for me. They were really good.

      I’d point a few things as critique, though. First of all, I’d try to spend a little more time in presenting the point-of-view character – they clearly reads as “mercenary” in this story, but there is little more besides it, so it is a little difficult to feel invested in them. Second, I think in the second to last paragraph you made a repetition on the word “speeds” (first as a noun, then as a verb). Usually, I’m not overly critical of these repetitions, but here in particular, being a fast-paced narrative, it feels a bit cacophonous, and a simple change would make that bit flows a little better.

      Anyway, a very interesting story, and with some striking visuals to go with it. The imagery is quite powerful and gripping.

      Thanks for sharing it!

      1. Thanks for the review! I don’t really write action scenes too often, and had fun with it. I’ll keep in mind your advice for my next submission!

  9. Mason Gray Avatar
    Mason Gray

    Echoes in the Rain
    by Mason Gray

    The city’s streets, once a cacophony of honking horns and distant chatter, now echoed only with the pitter-patter of rain. Buildings, tall and imposing, stood like ancient guardians, their windows reflecting the melancholic gray skies. Water pooled in the cracks of the pavement, and every droplet that splashed seemed to tell a story of its own.

    Jake, guitar in hand, sought shelter under a building’s awning. The raindrops splashed around him, each one a reminder of days gone by. Though damp, the strings of his guitar were ready to sing a song of longing, of memories that refused to fade.

    A sudden drip-drop on his guitar brought his attention to Lisa, a familiar face from the past. She stood a few feet away, her umbrella shielding her from the rain’s embrace. Their eyes met, a silent conversation passing between them, filled with questions neither dared to voice.

    “Why did you leave?” Jake’s voice broke the silence, the swoosh of rain accompanying his words. It was a question that had haunted him for years, a wound that never truly healed.

    Before Lisa could muster a reply, a young girl, drenched from head to toe, approached them. Her eyes, wide with fear, darted around. “I think I’m lost,” she said, her voice quivering.

    Jake and Lisa exchanged glances, the weight of their past momentarily forgotten. The present, with its pressing urgency, demanded their attention. Together, they shielded the girl from the rain, their combined umbrellas forming a makeshift canopy.

    As they navigated the labyrinthine streets, guiding the girl back to her home, the rain continued its relentless dance. But with each step, the trio found solace in each other’s company, discovering that sometimes, the most unexpected moments could heal old wounds.

    By the time they reached the girl’s home, the rain had reduced to a gentle drizzle. As they said their goodbyes, Jake and Lisa realized that the rain, with all its echoes of the past, had given them a chance at a new beginning.

    1. Nice! I enjoyed it, keep up the good work!

    2. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      This is a beautiful scene!

      I really like the progression of this story. It is a subtle and gentle thing, and it is quite fitting to the subtle and gentle moment they are sharing. It could be a dolorous conversation, but chance had made they spent that time doing something more pressing and important, and with that they could just feel what they needed to feel. And the whole chance encounter with the little girl in the rain is quite sweet.

      I also really love the language you use here. It is a very heartfelt tone, and a poetic one. As the story progresses, it becomes more and more hopeful, and that’s a simple change, but a very satisfying one.

      This is a very simple story, but quite well-crafted. It was a joy to read. Thanks for sharing it!

    3. I love your style of writing it’s pretty and poetic . The only part that confused me was when he started asking why Lisa left him I was expecting the girl he was speaking to to not be Lisa and he just imagined she was there ‘trick of the light’ or that they looked similar. It caught me off guard just by a little when Lisa and the protagonist helped the girl home. But I did like how it turned out how this one small act and working together helps him heal through the break up.

  10. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
    Arith_Winterfell

    “Blossoming Rains” (Alinar Setting) [Repost from Private]

    By: Arith_Winterfell

    Leana desperately wanted to learn magic, but continued to feel unease about the motives of the traveling mage. Mostly because of his appearance. He wore common gray robes, and the only obvious feature of his heritage was his horns that swept back and seemed to lay in his hair. He was fiend-blooded so of course she was wary about trusting him.

    “Let me show you something.” The fiend-blooded mage whispered in Leana’s ear. “Look!” he said softly as he finished the last gesture of magic.

    The energy weaved itself around her. She turned her eyes to where he pointed, out the door to the falling rain. She watched the wondrous sight as the rain drops slowed down to almost the point of being frozen in place. The droplets fell with gentle beauty beneath the gray skies.

    Leana stepped out in the slowed rain. She reveled in the wonder of it and danced amidst the raindrops. She passed one here. Spun beneath another there. Leaping over a third raindrop as it blossomed on the ground beneath her. Indeed, the water droplets blossomed all around her, on every leaf and blade of grass, into puddles and stones.

    She turned to look back upon the fiend-blooded one and saw he was smiling. Not the sinister smile of someone tricking another, but a genuine smile of someone enjoying something beautiful. She realized he wasn’t smiling at the wonder of the rainfall. Rain flowed normally to him, as she was the only one magically hastened. No, he was smiling because of her.

    To him, she was a blur of steps amidst the rain as she emerged back into the shelter of the barn. Then they sat together in silence, each watching from their different perspectives, the flow of the rain from the heavens till it blossomed on the ground.

    “I want to learn magic,” she said finally.

    “And I will teach it too you,” the fiend-blooded one said with a smile.

    1. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      Well, sometimes I wonder in some stories if they are really stories or just a well-crafted scene. And here we have a very well-crafted scene which encompass a whole story! This is so condensed in a moment, and so complete in it! Really good storycrafting here!

      I have commented it in other stories from you, but I will comment again: you have a very powerful skill in describing the subtle and minute details of magical moments. The description of the rainfalls slowing and Leana’s wonder at it is very catchy. The moment is magical, and the magic of it is present in the narration.

      And it all flows well and has a very well marked progression.

      I just love this story. Thanks a lot for sharing it!

    2. Berith Quinn Avatar
      Berith Quinn

      There is something innately beautiful and serene about this piece. For the lack of a better word, it is truly wholesome. From Leana’s hesitation due to perceived prejudice, to the childlike wonder at the beauty of what magic can achieve, there’s a genuine display of emotions and the realisation that a book shouldn’t be judged by its cover.

      I know that it’s probably reading too much into such a short piece of fiction, but I hope that is a start of a deep relationship between the two, romantic or otherwise.

  11. Sniperaxiom Avatar
    Sniperaxiom

    The voices of pub patrons buzzed behind me but I hardly noticed them. My senses were centered on my pint of beer and on the window.

    Blake took a seat beside me, his charms and trinkets spilling out of his bag as he placed it on the table. I stopped one of his iron nails from rolling off the table. Examining it skeptically I asked,

    “Now, what is the nail for?”

    “If you put it in your pocket, the fae can’t take you away. I have some for you and Arlo too.” Blake told me as he gathered up his good luck charms.

    “All of that really is not needed,” I told him, “ the fae will not manifest here because there are so many people.”

    I saw his eyes flickering about the room.

    “Sasha we can’t be too sure- they could be in disguise.”

    His newfound paranoia was warranted in this case, the water fairies would be at the height of their power during a midnight, summer storm. This would make traveling through their wood impossible with Blake.

    “Has Arlo been able to get any information from the local folklorists?”

    Blake gestured to Arlo in the corner of the room. I saw our companion sitting meekly on the bar stool beside some scholarly-looking man who was reprimanding him.

    “As you can see, so far they all say we are madmen to even suggest that they would be involved in one that’s been marked by the fae. Apparently their ambassadorship would be at risk to take us under their protection. They claim it would spark a war with the local fae chiefs.”

    I shook my head and looked out the window, almost entertaining the idea of handing Blake over. Amongst the rain, misty figures stalked between the trees. The storm still roared outside as it did the day before, and the day before that, begging to be taken as eternal.

    “Don’t worry Blake, the rain will stop some time. Just be patient and do not let the ‘good folk’ get in your head.”

    1. Mason Gray Avatar
      Mason Gray

      This piece beautifully captures the essence of a world where the supernatural intertwines with the mundane. The setting in a pub, with the backdrop of a storm and the looming threat of the fae, creates a palpable tension. The characters are intriguing, especially Blake with his bag of charms and trinkets. The dialogue flows naturally, revealing bits of the story’s world without feeling forced. The mention of local folklorists and fae chiefs hints at a larger, more complex world beyond this scene. The ending, with its imagery of misty figures and the eternal storm, leaves the reader with a haunting feeling. One suggestion would be to delve deeper into the relationship between the characters and their past experiences with the fae. Overall, it’s a captivating snippet of a larger tale, and it would be wonderful to see where this story goes. Keep up the excellent work and continue to explore this enchanting world you’ve created!

      1. Sniperaxiom Avatar
        Sniperaxiom

        Thank you so much! im glad you enjoyed it and that the dialogue didnt feel forced to a reader, that was my goal! i do see now that i did not add the title though haha.

  12. Aracnarquista Avatar
    Aracnarquista

    In the shade of war
    by Aracnarquista

    Alexia watches the roof of the Occluded Eye’s headquarter tower through the spyglass. Its rooftop is deserted right now, but that’s just a matter of time. It is a strange sight – the high crenelated parapet floating atop its own ruins on the streets below, where guards of the opposing factions limit access to the site.

    “Is it safe to look into the tower, Cass?”

    Cassandra surveys the sky through the other fixed spyglasses. An entire array of them is disposed on the south observatory’s terrace, where Cass dances among the scientific apparata while making observations, taking notes and checking timetables.

    “What do you mean by safe? It isn’t, by any means. Observations in the Ruined Tower are strictly forbidden, though the guards can’t do much to stop us. But I bet watching it during the ritual is… not advisable. I don’t know what kind of effect it might have on onlookers, but I doubt it would be pleasant.”

    The Forbidden Ritual… It has been six years since it was performed. But it has also been two and a half hours since it was last performed. They have little more than forty minutes before it happens again.

    It is a summer sunny day, perfect weather for aerial observations. Still, most of the city lies in shade. After all, the sky is littered with falling debris of airships and their crew.

    A terrible battle goes on in the skies, eternally repeating every three hours and twenty six minutes. It is a mercy the time loop bubble ends sixty meters above ground level. This allowed for the city to be rebuilt and return to a semblance of normalcy – even if its inhabitants had to adapt to seeing their guardians falling to their deaths continuously.

    This also allows for historians, such as Cassandra, to study and record the events as they are happening.

    “The spell… it won’t hold forever. I hope in time we learn from our past and avert repeating such follies. But even today, with this constant reminder above our heads, we are on the brink of reigniting the war…”

    1. Reidrev Avatar
      Reidrev

      I have been fooled again !
      Took me such a long time to get the time loop. I ticked at the ”the high crenellated parapet floating atop its own ruin” I thought it was odd but wrote it up as a strange metaphor or a show of power from Alexia.

      I’m glad you explained it later tho ^^ Once again you offer us very competent writing. A city in ruin and rebuilt at the same time, the horrifying implication of seeing your guardian fall forever.

      The job of an historian is pretty good in this setting too ^^ recording event that happened and are happening. Watching, what I am guessing the cause of the city destruction (with the apparent war), the ritual.

      I have trouble with the line ”has been six years since it was performed. But it has also been two and a half hours since it was last performed.” I feel like it could flow a lot better, even with knowing it was a time loop it’s still a bit jarring.

      In any case thanks for offering us this text, I love your writing style ^^

      1. Aracnarquista Avatar
        Aracnarquista

        Thanks a lot for the comment and feedback, Reidrev!

        This was kind of a challenge. I had tried two other stories – one was just too confusing for it to work, and the other one felt too personal. Then this idea came up, and it sort of worked – though I really struggled with the word count. I needed at least some 50 words more to make it really clear, I guess.

        I had a very clear image in my head for this one, but it was not easy to tell it in a compelling way, and I still think it is, at least in part, more obscure than what I intended it to be. And breaking time is always a recipe for some confusion.

        I completely agree that the line about the occurrence of the ritual could flow better. I was quite tired when writing it, and this time I just didn’t feel in me the desire to wait and try to solve it better afterwards. I know it would end up as a strange line – after all, the idea was to make a somewhat strange repetition, that implied it has happened and showed us the timeframe of the war, but also explained the timeframe of the moment of the battle that is stuck in the time loop. But it could be better written and a bit clearer.

        Anyway, I’m really glad you liked it. It is always good to know when our style resonates with our readers! Thanks a lot for the comment!

    2. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
      Arith_Winterfell

      This story is an interesting exploration of time loop magic. The way it captures a set of events (the forbidden ritual, the destruction of airships, and the death of their crew) in a repeating loop is fascinating. It’s also interesting how Cassandra and Alexia interact, and how that interaction shapes the development of our understanding of the time loop and its magic in the scene. We start with the simple observations, that thoughts of Alexia about what would happen if the Forbidden Ritual were observed through a spy glass, and finally a full explanation about the time loop and its nature. Lastly it is interesting how the story comes to a close with its imagery of the time loop acting not only as a rain of death in the past being recorded by historians now, but also how it acts as a constant reminder and shadow over the people about the nature and threat of warfare. All in all an interesting and solid story!

      1. Aracnarquista Avatar
        Aracnarquista

        Thanks a lot for the comment and feedback, Arith!

        I like to play with time in narratives, but doing so in flash fiction is quite challenging. This one was written is a bit of a rush, and it was basically the production of a first draft, then a rewritten in a second one to compress the ideas an images, and some minor adjustments – not my usual workflow for these pieces, but I like the product this time.

        I’m quite glad that even though I couldn’t use all the words I want to clarify what it going on and the intricacies of how I envisioned the time loop operating, it seems like the general idea was clear enough and the story worked with that amount of information.

        Once again, thanks!

    3. I liked it, though it took me a while to be able to clearly visualize what was happening. Keep up the good work!

      1. Aracnarquista Avatar
        Aracnarquista

        Thanks, Vex.

        Yeah, I kind of expected it to be somewhat difficult to visualize. Not only the idea itself is a bit confusing, but the order I chose to tell the story keeps most of the information obscured until very late into it. This is intentional, but I see how it can make it a bit difficult to parse what one should be seeing in the scene. I’m glad you like it!

        Once again, thanks for the comment and feedback.

  13. Gunpowder Avatar
    Gunpowder

    Title: Off the Coast of Orion

    „Sir, we can’t keep playing rain forever.“

    The old man groaned, leaning forward in the soft leather recliner. This cafe, the Windows Lodge, had become one of his favorite spots, in no small part due to their holo-screen „windows“. For five crouns, patrons could put text on one of the small display screens, and the highest payer could pick what the large holo-screen displayed. Of course, the ability to change the display relied on the person with the controls relinquishing them when their payment was overtaken. Right now, the screen dripped with a gentle afternoon rain, a gentle pitter echoing faintly throughout the cafe.

    „Ah‘ know, ah‘ know. It’s jus‘, relaxing, is all.“ He sat back. „Ah bet you kids have never even seen real weather. All just that holographical phonies.“
    He pointed back at one of the clerks. „Ya know, when ah‘ still piloted hoppers, we would shoot around in skies that rained glass! Can ya believe?“

    „Seems like you’ve been all over.“ A younger clerk poked their head from behind the counter. „Have you heard about the Raspberry-„

    „Yeah, yeah, the Raspberry Cloud.“ He waved his hand dismissively. „It’s not all it’s cracked up to be, truth,“ he scoffed. „You go there when you’re young, with a few buddies, get blasted off your ass, wake up a week later, no keys, no wallet, some strange contraption wrapped around your-„

    „Ahem!“ the head clerk interjected, eyeing the old man.

    „Uh, well, um… It’s a dumb tradition, ah guess is what I’m sayin‘. Not worth it. You’re better off going to see some real beautiful weather. Go ring surfing and watch the Red Spot. Much more fun. Anyways…“ He slowly stood and held out a small glass cylinder. „Who’s got next? Better put somethin‘ decent on.“

    The holo-screen flickered off, revealing the sickly yet constant pale green sky. Hardly any light could penetrate the dense ammonia fog. The old man grunted as he put on his rad suit, struggling with the diffuser mask until the young clerk helped him put it on.

    „Thank you, son. You know, they’re right. Ah can‘t play rain forever. But it sure is nice every once in a while.“

    1. Strong Treasure Planet vibes with this one Gunpowder, I love it!

      The roughness of the customer’s voice really came through, I can hear his gruff gravelly tones reminiscing on the good times between Jupiter and Klingor 7. You built the world up nicely, would love to explore more of the Raspberry cloud (without picking up any strange contraptions) and the ammonia cloud planet in another story.

      Keep em coming

  14. Strong Berry Avatar
    Strong Berry

    A Rain in the Summer?!
    By Strong Berry

    My dearest Farah,

    Today, the Floridian sky itself prepared a surprise for me. I was planning to go to the beach after running some errands, since the forecast (Which I now know never to trust again, as it apparently has the same chance of getting it right as a drunk “psychic”) the day said it would be “Sunny and hot”, but as they say here “Man laughs and God plans” (Or something like that).

    The day started out as foretold, not a cloud in the sky. I was at some fruit store (I can’t remember its’ name, but it was in a building, not like a bazaar) wearing shorts, a t-shirt, and sweating like a pig. I was checking out some fruit called a “Dragon Fruit” (Before you ask, no, it’s not made of dragons and won’t let you breathe fire. It does have a nice taste though, I’ll bring home some for you), when I started to hear heavy rain from outside. I looked outside to see the street looking like I went back in time, like it wasn’t in an American July, but in a Moroccan January.

    A rain in the summer?! I was astonished. So astonished I was that I forgot I was wearing summer clothes, and went outside. I got soaking wet within just a few seconds, and quickly went back inside. A part of me must’ve thought I was hallucinating, because my first thought was “This is real rain!”. America is truly the land of the free, it seems. Even the sky can decide to rain whenever it wants.

    I went in and out of the store to feel the rain every time my clothes got dry enough. The people there gave me weird looks, but I didn’t care. It was something I never saw or felt before. When the rain ended, I was genuinely sad. But all good things must end, I suppose. At least now I can go to the beach again.

    So, what is the moral here? Never trust American forecast.

    Love you forever, Amir.

    1. Shinigamma Avatar
      Shinigamma

      I really like the way you wrote this as someone writing a letter to their loved one. Im guessing that they are an immigrant to the US and presumably they come from a nation that may suffer under some sort of authoritarian leadership (the land of the free line kind of hints at it). So there is a lot of sweetness to how positively they react to the oncoming rain. And a nice moral to this piece too.

      Nice job!

  15. To Mathew Wet, Author of YA series Rains Reign,
    By Green.
    You better be without power, flooded out of your home, drowning in a puddle or any combination of the three. as I will be pelting you with large amounts of hellfire If you are off sulking, again, over one little editing note.

    No real author would ever do that, right? Certainly not an author who has published EIGHT books and received this SAME note for the last six years.

    All this note points out is your over-reliance on the word “Rain”.

    This of course cannot be a bigger fucking understatement. A weatherman during a hurricane would use it fewer times per minute. no lie, we counted.

    I get that this series would not work without the phenomenon, being set on a storm planet and all, but come on man.

    show us some creativity.

    There could be a towering torrent or a dangerous deluge. Any sort of variance would improve this repetitious drizzle, please I beg of you. Save your readers from the most apathetic storms and cloudbursts of bleh. Shower us with vivid colours and intense feelings, I know you can do it.

    I’ve even tried to show how much this bizarre crutch word is holding you back by only using the word twice. Once in an earlier paragraph to define the problem and again in a VERY REAL threat down below.

    The next thing I receive from you better be a seven-hundred-page manuscript. Or I will begin mailing you one cup of rainwater for every instance of “The” word I find in the copy we send out to print.

    I’m NOT joking.
    I will be sticking stamps on and mailing bags of water for a month, in the slowest attempted drowning ever.

    P.S. This note came from me and only me. If I find you taking it out on junior editors we will drop you as a client.

    1. Reidrev Avatar
      Reidrev

      Oh my Glorb! I cannot handle the puns, it was a deluge of metaphor, comparison and just plain humour.
      I adore the “A VERY REAL threat down below”, the “slowest attempted drowning”, and the way the author sounds like a real pain to deal with and is characterized by a short temper, a tendency to sulk and an unwillingness to see his fault. All of that was quite subtle and very interesting.

      I wish the mention of hellfire wouldn’t be there though, it doesn’t fit very well with the rest of the pun. It’s a very very clever comeback in a vacuum but it doesn’t feel… watery enough. I think using sea monsters or the deluge you mention later would work better in this instance.

      Also, I have to point the title of the fictitious book “Rain Reigns”, which is a GLORIOUS metaphor for the fictitious author himself.

  16. i-prefer-the-term-antihero Avatar
    i-prefer-the-term-antihero

    [DM me on Discord for details!]

    1. Reidrev Avatar
      Reidrev

      That’s an adorable story about the magic of reading ^^ I like that the kid read Cornelius Agrippa who was more of a philosopher than a novelist, however, but, since it’s a larger work maybe the thought of the occultist will imprint on the young Victor^^
      I really really love the first metaphor, water pittering like fairies walking on glass, that’s very lovely to think about it that way. And, even I don’t see it, I’m sure you could have carried on that metaphor to the sludge that pulls Victor down (like rain squishing him ? Or a remark that if he let the fairies in they would burry him further ect ect)

      One problem I notice is the expository tell at the beginning: “I wanted to play outside but my parents wouldn’t let me”. I sincerely think that cutting that out (and the adorable little remark afterwards, sadly) would leave the story completely unchanged.
      Especially since it caused me a tiny confusion, apparently outside but afterwards he says there’s a party he wants to attend to? It’s very minor, of course, but still made me reread a few lines.

      Also, but I’m not a native speaker, the way the father talk sounds weird to me, overly formal and he seems more “educated”, more old school than the mother I don’t think it was intended. But the “It is sad trash” was as violent as it was funny!

      On the other hand, the rest of the story is very well done I laughed out loud at each parentheses. I loved the way Victor is ensnared by the writing. And the final metaphor, how the disappointment is a rain that isn’t strong enough to quench the fire, that’s A-grade writing right there!

    2. Arith_Winterfell Avatar
      Arith_Winterfell

      Having studied Frankenstein, I absolutely delight in the mention of Victor’s interest in Cornelius Agrippa knowing how it sets in motion Victor’s passions for the science, medicine, and discovery. This story struck me as in some ways two stories in one (or rather two scenes). You have the first scene centered on Victor’s childhood boredom and his mother trying to encourage him to not let the rain hold down his imagination. Then the counterpoint second scene wherein Victor discovers the text and his imagination runs wild with it, leading later to what will be a life long fascination (and doom).

      Narratively you do some really good work with the language of this story too! Vivid language (the rain being like the pitter of fairies) and chain of rising engagement through words, to phrases, sentences, and so on. The boredom sloughing off, and a light bubbling excitement. All very vivid and exciting imagery. All in all this is an excellent and beautiful addition to the world of The Ballad of the Monsters!

    3. It’s a shame I haven’t read your stories more often, out the gate you greet the reader with some potent descriptions, comparing the rain to fairies and coloring the boredom like sludge. You wrote simply yet so compellingly, and now I need to be better in my own writing. I also love the message’s here of ‘one mans trash is another mans treasure’ and the idea that although times may be bad and will get better, you still can decide how you spend it. you can spend it complaining about what you don’t have, or crack open a book and let your mind wander. I don’t know if that second message was intentional, I know if I wrote this it wouldn’t be but idk how meticulous you are in your writing. I’d say if there’s anything that could be improved on (this coming from a much worse author so please ignore if I’m speaking out my ass) is the dialogue. maybe I just need to get used to reading more dialogue again but it felt, to fast? like I couldn’t feel the flow or speed of the conversation despite the amount of character and sass packed in, so maybe I defaulted to reading the lines fast, idk.

      Lovely read, cant wait for next week!

    4. Victor: Mom, look! I did what you said! I used my imagination! And some science and maybe magic, but mostly imagination! I made a living being out of corpse parts I stole from the cemetary!

      Mom?

      Mom, why are you running?!

      You should have just let me go to the party, Mom!

      End scene.

      All kidding aside, this was such a fun story! And you did an amazing job with your descriptions, especially in the beginning. And it does actually paint a picture of Victor having a great imagination even before his mentions it.

      I don’t get to see much of Victor’s family in your stories, so it is really interesting seeing him so… normal? Even if this could easily be classed as a turning point for him.

      I also love that there’s clearly a literal raining but it’s also Victor’s boredom that doesn’t last and we actually see that one lifted by the end.

      I do think my favorite part is how you described him becoming enthralled by the book. How it was just a word that caught his attention and that spread until he was just reading it all in excitement. I feel we’ve all had that moment, when something just strikes that chord with us and you captured it so well!

      Great take on the prompt! As always, it makes me excited to read more of your world.

  17. Raining Champion
    By: Boople

    “Criminals! Foreigners! Slaves! Bastards! All the scum we could round up or buy for the entertainment of the empire! On this wonderfully rainy day we have some exquisite matches prepared just for you! Firstly we have…”

    Atlas had to admit the man had quite the powerful voice even through pounding rain. One such as his was needed to announce the upcoming show of guts, watching the brave have theirs spilled to gladiators more capable.

    Gladiators like Atlas.

    Today will mark the third day of his indentured career in entertainment, with the added communal benefit of shortening a select few life sentences among his fellow prisoners. There were worse ways for him to spend his sentence though, he could be wasting away in a hole in the ground, or be dead. So all things considered he was grateful near-lethal exercise was his punishment.

    And his chauffeur to show time arrived with the sound of jingling keys to free him from his binds.

    “AH Dimitri! Should I expect to see you tomorrow releasing me once more unto the fray?”

    *Click*

    “I don’t think so, Atlas.”

    “I’m sorry?”

    “I guess you haven’t been paying attention to the announcer today.”

    “Why spoil the surprise?”

    “Because Atlas, this surprise as you put it is Rome’s reigning champion.”

    *Click*

    “Oh, well that explains your lack of enthusiasm.”

    “Mhm.”

    “Well you don’t have to worry my goo-”

    “Please don’t make this promise. You are fun, but not fun enough for the emperor to keep you alive.”

    “May I promise to try to survive?”

    *Click*

    “I won’t let you say it but-”

    *Thunk*

    “-with your chains off, you are allowed to prove me wrong.”

    Atlas took a deep breath in, danced in his daily dose of freedom, and steeled himself for the match ahead. Thunder cracked across the sky, bringing the gladiators attention out to the stands. The roar of people and water set a uniquely intimidating scene.

    “It’ll be a muddy one that’s for sure.”

    “…”

    “I wonder which reign will stop first.”

    1. Fog Wall Avatar
      Fog Wall

      Curious way to approach the prompt! I very much love your style on display on this piece. With how cheerful Atles is with the circumstances of the status quo, even after what he had learnt later on he retained that demeanor. He seems very scholerly and well read, which gives to questions of how he ended up there and where he had once been.

      It’s a scene well set.

      I also really appreciated the profound triple threat of it not always gonna rain… reign… and his probable death or victory.

      Hopeful, he does survive day.

      Either way though, I love the civility of order and expectant comrodery between these two in spite of their positions. The guard, Dimitri seemed settled in routine and yet a bit non-chelant in his role, but again, the two weren’t presented as confrontational. Was a nice change of pace and felt historic.

      Over all, very nice!

  18. Edelweisse
    By Newt Manhattan

    The grassy plain seemed to stretch out into eternity, an ocean of verdant movement. Foreboding clouds cast long shadows dancing overhead as an adolescent girl sat there staring out into the landscape before her. Her skin was pale, almost luminous in nature when contrasted with the weather.
    The wind was slowly whipping itself into a flurry as she sat there, and it made her look a mess, like a tornado of silvery blonde locks. Despite this the youth leaned back into a more comfortable position in the grass so that she could gaze more attentively into the void. As her hands found turf, droplets began to intermittently fall from the sky, thumping into the earth to make a cacophony of impacts.

    “You’ll catch a cold if you stay out here too long, Nivale.”

    Nivale was a statue making no indications of hearing her father. Silence hung thick in the air as the older bearded fellow gazed down at his daughter. She could hear the sound of him running his hands through his beard as he spoke, “I miss her too kiddo.”

    Before she could respond the rain was upon them. The heavens had become a menacing thing as the droplets rushed down to the dirt. Nivale turned to her father and saw an older balding man with eyes that betrayed fatigue. That was a trait they had both shared.

    In the storm she looked so miniscule somehow with her hair matted to her lean frame. Slowly Nivale stood and trudged her way through the mud to her father. “Will I always feel this way dad? Is this what life is?”

    He responded with a warm smile and gave her a gentle peck on the forehead. “Your mother always used to say I was born with melancholy inside me. Said it was such a shame for a soul so beautiful to be that sorrowful. When I would fall into my sadness much the same way you are, she’d always say the same thing. ‘The rain will pass my love. It always does.”

    1. Gunpowder Avatar
      Gunpowder

      This is quite the endearing yet melancholic story! You’ve done a good job creating a scenic backdrop (I would guess it’s somewhere in the Midwest US). I don’t know exactly what’s happened to this girl and her father, but I can certainly feel empathy for the sorrow. I appreciate the attention to sound, as well. Only comment I’d have is to be wary of commas („Will I always feel this way, dad?“), but that’s just a personal nitpick. Good story!

    2. Mason Gray Avatar
      Mason Gray

      This narrative is a poignant exploration of grief, loss, and the passage of time. The vivid descriptions of the environment, from the grassy plains to the foreboding clouds, serve as a beautiful metaphor for the emotional landscape of the characters. Nivale’s luminous skin and silvery blonde locks paint a vivid picture of a young girl caught in the throes of sorrow. The interaction between father and daughter is heart-wrenching, with the father’s gentle words and the memory of the mother acting as a beacon of hope amidst the storm of emotions.

      The use of the rain as a symbol for sorrow and the eventual passing of grief is masterfully done. The dialogue is authentic and touching, revealing the depth of their shared pain and the bond between them. The ending, with the father’s recollection of the mother’s words, offers a glimmer of hope and the promise of healing.

      One suggestion would be to delve a bit deeper into Nivale’s emotions, perhaps through her internal thoughts or memories, to give the reader a more intimate understanding of her grief. Overall, this is a beautifully crafted piece that resonates with emotion and captures the essence of human resilience. Keep writing and sharing such heartfelt stories. Your talent shines through in every word.

  19. Chaz Jazzman Avatar
    Chaz Jazzman

    The Sun Will Come Out
    By Chazz Jazzman

    I sit in my prison cell waiting to be fried in the electric chair, I am here because I killed the six members of some punk rock band “Random.”

    I had written a song with the rest of my band, we had calm acoustic guitars, a chill drummer laying down the beat, and a bass player you could set a clock to. Our band was called “The Rhinoceros Beatles,” and we wrote a song, called “Can’t Rain All the Time,” it was an instant hit. We had some other songs that were not as popular, like “Hey Dude” “Here Comes the Moon” and “Nothing,” they were famous, but not hits like this one. In week 1 we were 49th on the billboard, in week 2 we here 30th, and by week 3 we were 17th.

    Week 3 was when the lead singer from a band I never heard of called “Random” approach me and asked if he could remake my song. I told him he could, because he was some band no one cared about, and his song couldn’t possibly be more popular than mine. He sent me the song, and it was an abomination, he took my chill, laidback song, and turned it into a screaming moshpit full of distortion and crazy drum beats.

    Their version of my song became number one on the charts, while mine was only seven. I become infuriated so I went to a bar to have a drink, when I got there a man approached me and said, aren’t you the guy that copied Ranom’s song and made it sound awful?”

    I became so angry at his comment that I stormed out of the bar and went home. I found a tutorial on how to make a car bomb on the dark web and made it. When Random was at an award festival for their song, I rigged the bomb under their car. When they got into the car I began to sing my song, “Can’t rain all the time, Do Do Do Do, Can’t rain all the time, the sun will come out, can’t rain all the time,” right before I started the second verse, they got into the car, and I pressed the button…

  20. Rain

    By Galer.

    Raining was a common phenomenon in all parts of Gerard’s world.

    It was for the most part annoying and soothing, while the melody of the water could be appreciated most people didn’t like to get wet.

    Except maybe for the ones that appreciate the impromptu shower most likely kids or people that valued the rain.

    That would be, of course, in a world that made sense.

    Here was another matter: it rained rainbow water that made people’s skin a technicolor mess. Some with some temporary phantom limbs even faces. It made plants and landscapes sentient and turned them into psychedelic disasters.

    Not to mention sometimes it rained up instead of down, with literal clouds forming on the floor.

    “Well for the people with a sphere for a face this is their normal,” Gerard said out loud while babysitting the mad scientist. “Hey, are you done with whatever you are doing?”

    “Gerard, my dear, I can’t expedite research you know?” Xelonian the hornet humanoid said. A manic smile on his face as a machine beside him collected the rainbow liquid. “Even if it’s nonsense the properties need to be investigated”

    Gerard just gave him a face “Last time you did that, you accidentally created a new species…again”

    “I meant if it is any consolation, they aren’t dangerous. ” Xelonian said, far too relaxed “That and my children contribute to society on this planet. Thank you very much”

    “Ok but they are also prone to do the same crap you do,” Gerard explained a bit annoyed. “Although with more restraint”

    “So what? They are following in their father’s footsteps” Xelonian just shrugged as the rain stopped “And oh please I have-”

    Xelonian was interrupted by the machine spewing something that wouldn’t be out of place from the mind of someone high on LCD. “Papa?”

    Gerard just looked at the mad scientist

    “I will get the adoption papers ready,” Xelonian said with an apologetic smile.

    Gerard groaned. It wasn’t a boring job, however, moments like this made it irritating beyond belief.

  21. Berith Quinn Avatar
    Berith Quinn

    Captain’s Lament
    (A Tale from Aetherion)
    By Berith Quinn

    With a silent sigh, Meredith scanned the quarters of Captain Starzia. The room stunk of booze from the empty bottles that listlessly rolled across the floor, as the ship tossed and swayed in the howling storm. Though the wind whipped across the ship’s sail, while the torrential rain splattered across the deck, it could not drown out the rumbling snores reverberating from the slumbering captain.

    Every night, for the past week, Starzia would demand more rum, only to be followed by drunken wails of a broken heart. In a way, the ship lived up to its name, Maria’s Lament, as it absently sailed the seas, hounded by a storm without end.

    As she slowly picked up the countless empty bottles of rum that were carelessly discarded, Meredith stared out of the window. What was it that her grandmother always used to say? The wails of lost souls at sea could even make the heavens weep.

    The thought of her grandmother made Meredith pause, as she thought back tears of her own. For Meredith, it had only been a week since she buried her grandmother. But for Starzia, it had only been a week since being reunited with her lost love, only to lose her once again. Meredith couldn’t fathom the cruel irony of waiting two lifetimes to see a loved one, only to lose them in an instant.

    Meredith couldn’t recall just how many times her grandmother Maria had told her the story of the pirate captain that saved her life and stole her heart. It was a story that Meredith had always dismissed as a fanciful tale. Nothing more than an ageing woman’s fantasy to sail the seas.

    It never occurred to Meredith that Starzia was that pirate. The fearless Hellhound. The unageing immortal. Cursed to sail until the end of days. Now lost and alone from a broken heart.

    No… not alone.

    As she wiped her sleeve against her red eyes, Meredith heard the rain ease to a light pitter patter against the window.

    “This storm won’t last, my captain…” Meredith whispered, as she kissed Starzia’s forehead softly.

    1. I wanna read more from these characters. 🙂

      1. Berith Quinn Avatar
        Berith Quinn

        I’m glad that you like it. I’ve written about Starzia in the past, but this is Meredith’s first appearance.

    2. Newt Manhattan Avatar
      Newt Manhattan

      This seems like a really fun plot hook for story and I particularly enjoyed the line about the wails of lost souls at sea. The first paragraph could maybe use a once over for grammatical issues, there’s some run on sentences I feel. Other than that this is delightful, I think really think you could do even more with this.

      1. Berith Quinn Avatar
        Berith Quinn

        Why thank you. I probably should edit my work more, or at least get other people to critique it more. I am pleased that snippets of world building does intrigue people.

    3. This is delightful! I mean it’s solemn of course, but a wonderful read. I love the bits of connection you managed to make in such a small window. Meredith as a character is handled wonderfully, and Captain Starzia is intriguing from what little we do learn.

      I do have to say as charming a read as this is, the third sentence feels weird. “Though the wind whipped across the ship’s sail, while the torrential rain splattered across the deck, it could not drown out the rumbling snores reverberating from the slumbering captain.”

      Specifically the word ‘while’ feels off at that spot. I would add ‘And’ right before it, or replace the ‘though’ in the beginning with the While. Maybe I’m reading it weird today or something but this one sentence stuck out in a great story as a stutter.

      Overall Lovely and Charming story, can’t wait to read more!

      1. Berith Quinn Avatar
        Berith Quinn

        Yeah, I do admit the first paragraph stumbled a little. I wanted to add more sounds to paint a better visual. I probably should have made it more simple in order to flow better.

        I am glad that you enjoyed this snippet of the lives of my characters.

  22. Report
    by Sooth

    “Kahn Riddleston should never have stepped into the ring. I know why he did it. I have no idea what made him believe he could win.”

    “He prepped, proper diligence. Every day in dat gym. Proper food. No drugs. He worked on building muscle wit weights and bodily aerobics wit equal intensity. Against a proper opponent, he woulda won…but his initial hypothesis just turned out wrong.”

    “He was so proud of himself when he walked into the Pike Building. He loved that stage, with the lights and roaring crowd.”

    “I remember the first hit of the match. After all the introductions, all the neon signs highlighting the fighters. After the outpouring of love for the obvious underdog. It got very quiet after that first hit.”

    KROCK! A reporter appears on screen, looks into the camera, then disappears as fight highlights cycle, one after another.

    From off screen, she says, “Several speakers, each the size of a fist, amplified the noise of Kahn’s jaw breaking so that 550,000 spectators could hear it. Microphones the size of a broken tooth buzzed the sound out to another 330,000,000 spectators on couches, soiled bed mattresses, or just walking through the rain in their cities of diffused neon glow, watching the feed through eye implants and so-called invisible keyboards.

    “Kahn’s opponent set world records that day for cybernetic fighters. The A.I. controlled robot known as ALLI managed to rain down strikes on Kahn 782 times without killing him. It broke 193 bones, and due to its punishment, Kahn lost 3.2 litres of blood. Of course, thousands of cameras the size of flies flew around, catching every drop as it hit the floor of the ring, the robot, the front row spectators.

    Mister Riddleston survived the match. He doesn’t care much for the public eye anymore it would seem. Constantly bothered by nonstop gawkers or content producers’ spyware, he put out a candid riff-vid telling us, ‘Much like the strikes which downed me in my last fight, y’all gotta stop sometime.’

    Now here’s George with I’m guessing another soggy weather forecast.”

    1. Reidrev Avatar
      Reidrev

      I adore the ending ^^ ”the rain has to stop sometimes” ”Well it won’t !”
      The story is quite nice too ^^
      I am bit dubious of the comparison for the mechanicals things ”speakers the size of a fist, cameras the size of flies” I think I get the idea : describing the match without describing it. Perhaps it was too experimental for my taste ? But I salute the effort ^^

      Also I am unsure of the narrator being an actual person, it just doesn’t feels right to me, especially with the comparison that feels expository and descriptive more than an announcer hyping up the viewers.

      In any case great story and I really enjoy the way you innovated in writing mechanism even if I wasn’t always receptive^^

      1. My goal was to tell this story without allowing [Kahn] to be the storyteller. Then I became perhaps too ambitious and attempted to worldbuild more than absolutely necessary in trying to talk about the tech. This in turn took words away from explaining how the reporter is who they are. Thank you for the criticism, I appreciate it!

        I hope you truly were able to have fun with the story, at least in part!

    2. Shinigamma Avatar
      Shinigamma

      Ooh, I like this. The build-up is really well done, I can feel the hype of the spectators getting behind Kahn Riddleston. And then you bring the reader crashing down with your gut-renching description of Kahn’s defeat.

      The reporter style of the piece is a nice touch. I think there are a few issues with tenses (mixing present and past tense) which leads to a disjointed feel. However, that aside, I really like the whole premise and how you put it all together.

      Nice work!

      1. I am guilty of mixing tenses. It’s an ongoing struggle, lol! Thank you for reading!

  23. Fog Wall Avatar
    Fog Wall

    In Decision

    ~Fog Wall

    James placed my bowl on a table as he joined me. Using the toe of his boot he pulled a chair half-way out and took a seat at the table I just broke. “Calm down and talk to me. Koelle, what’s bothering you?”

    I met his eyes; they were sleepy pools of gray that stole my anger away. “James, why did you join me that day? Why accept my offer?”

    He blinked and glanced down at my still clenched fist before answering. He gave a yawn and lazily scratched his scalp. “Well, I had no direction before. I was studying to be a bioelectrical engineer, but the schooling was too expensive. Something like twenty-five million haal for the ten year program. Working at that media firm was only like five hundred haal a week.”

    This was a frustrating feeling. To be torn between the life I dreamt of and the found family that took me in… I fell back into my seat. “Back when I was a kid living in the alleys, I promised myself that I would never steal from anyone.”

    “And now that’s your job. To steal from the rich and powerful for the benefit of thousands who deserve a better existence.” 

    His voice was sharp and his words felt like needles piercing my heart. “That’s right.” I told him with a whispered pause. “I owe this place and these people my life though. They saved me when I had no one to rely on.” I told him, feeling the contempt of my predicament come back in full force.

    He must have seen something change in my expression, because he leaned forward onto the busted table. “Koelle, you’ve done plenty for them and I’m sure, if they’re your family, they’d understand and support your decision to leave.”

    My heart skipped a beat as clarity washed over me, quickly but not completely erasing my contemplation. “You’re right, I guess.”

    “After that close call you had… I think some real change will do you well, Sis. Not every day’s a rainy one.”

    I smiled, “Today’ll be sunny.”

    1. A fantastic read, I loved your use of metaphors!

      You masterfully set the stage with your descriptions and your characters feel vivid!

      But as for criticism, I would say to pay a bit more attention to your character’s expressions and emotions while they speak, such as expanding upon James’ odd reaction to seeing Koelle’s discomfort. I can not quite tell what James is feeling – why is he leaning on the table? Is he trying to intimidate Koelle after reading her face and realizing that she is uncomfortable? Or is he leaning on it lazily, simply letting the table (or what remains of it) support him?
      But come to think of it, that might have been an issue of fitting everything into the 350 word maximum. Hmm.

      But regardless, it was a blast to read this! I like your clever title. Sorry if this came off as harsh, I’m still learning. You’ve got a really nice writing style!

      1. Fog Wall Avatar
        Fog Wall

        I’m glad you liked the story! I agree, I wanted to but failed to find a better way to express their physical expressions. I tried to though and I’ll slowly improve over time.

    2. Interesting world you’ve made here. A group of thieves working on a semi-professional level to redistribute wealth, thanks to what feels to be a larger organisation for that purpose.

      They take in people with nowhere else to go and teach them to be part of their scheme.

      And it looks like they bear no grudges. Or our protagonists HOPE that they’ll bear no grudges.

      Fingers crossed, it’s a GOOD found family

      1. Fog Wall Avatar
        Fog Wall

        They’ll be fine with it and yes, its a branch of a larger group of hackers and thieves.

    3. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      So, I’ll try to be brief this time.

      I’m already invested in this universe and these characters, and I tend to already like seeing stories with them. This feels like a pivotal moment to them – and even though I’ve been following your stories for some time, I’m still a bit confused as to what exactly has happened to make Koelle reconsider her place among her comrades. For the most part, you made a really good job in making the emotional journey of the piece shines, and their connection is really well presented here.

      I have a bit of criticism about the clarity of who is talking – specially on the fourth and fifth paragraphs, and specially when considering how the sixth paragraph begins. My impression is that all of those lines are Koelle commenting on what James just said, but the description focusing then on his voice makes it a bit confusing.

      Anyway, this was a pleasant reading. Thanks for sharing!

      1. Fog Wall Avatar
        Fog Wall

        Fourth paragraph is Koelle, making the fifth is James, and sixth is back to Koelle. I took off a “James said” on Para.5 for word count.

        I’m glad you caught on the turning point, but keeping in mind this happens the morning after Veivaun breaks into the city and after she escaped that getting caught situation (which I do want to feature, evetually.)

  24. Reidrev Avatar
    Reidrev

    This too shall pass (Morgan & Alea)

    By Reidrev

    Alea entered the great church of Lunapale, it was smaller than she expected still it was still grand and the few paintings and sculptures that remained were magnificent, even if half of them were a bit mangled.

    The place was empty of visitors. None wanted to hike on the mountain under the rain, no matter if it was merely a drizzle.

    There was a man though, Alea didn’t notice him at first with his robes and stole, white with golden embroideries, which fit perfectly with the decor. If he didn’t move in front of the altar Alea may never have known he was there.

    Returning her stare, he walked over to her, his back straight and his movement swift despite his old age. « I salute, the Princess Alea Ylsure, I am, your humble servant, the archbishop Leon! May I assume that you are a woman of the faith? »

    «I am indeed, and it has been too long since I showed reverence to the Saintly Sames. Although you only serve the greatest among them, it seems.» Alea answered softly.

    «Do not fret child, your presence here is penance enough.» The archbishop’s eyes drifted to the mangled statues. «Yes. As you can see, our faith pays the price of my predecessors’ hubris.»

    Alea’s posture dropped, she looked, through the stained glass, at the city below. «I am deeply sorry to hear that. I will do my utmost so my parents allow the Saintly Sames to shine once again.»

    «Your words warm my heart but do not fear! Like the rain, this too shall pass.» He said turning his head to the city but keeping an eye on her. He paused «Although, your presence here might be a sign.» Alea perked up but the archbishop’s eyes stared into the void for a moment, looking for something the princess couldn’t fathom. «Tell me, princess, have you heard of the great warriors known as Namekeepers.»

    1. I loved this piece. Well done, Reidrev. The sixth paragraph down, I really love how that is written.

    2. I really like the style of this piece. It just feels like a saga being recorded and retold; something a faith and culture might write down, about one of their heroes. The world building is also very subtle here, making it very intriguing and it flows naturally.

      The allegory of the rain Leon uses to describe his faith is really interesting. He seems very hopeful for the future and it looks like he intends for Alea to help him realize these hopes. I did note that most people don’t want to hike to Lunapale, because of the drizzle, which is really fitting. Rain does keep a lot of people inside, if they can help it.

      Well written!

    3. Gunpowder Avatar
      Gunpowder

      This world is very intriguing! I’ve played many games like Momodora that I’m fascinated by fantasy religions and how they can interact, and sometimes clash, with fantasy governments. The grammar and flow in the beginning paragraph is a bit choppy; watch out for run ons and the like. You’ve done a good job creating the good kind of confusion, though. I’m interested in the lore, the Saintly Sames, the Namekeepers. Good job!

    4. Aracnarquista Avatar
      Aracnarquista

      Well, I’m already invested into this story and this universe, so you know I read it with interest. That being said, I think this one has a little bit of a problem in standing alone on its own. This story feels like a fragment of a larger story that does not exactly deliver its own point. It shows us some very interesting details of worldbuilding that are new, but it does not feel like the story is developing in what is being told – it is like the part just after the cliffhanger is necessary for it to really land as a stand alone.

      Apart from that, I really like the descriptions, and there are elements of the faith and religion that are quite intriguing. I really like how the presentation of the ordeal to get to the temple but also the stained glasses and the priest attire invokes a sense of religious glory and gravitas, and the name Saintly Sames in itself calls my attention. I can’t wait to know more about that.

      I have some small things to point out:

      – “[…] it was smaller than she expected [still/but] it was still grand and the few paintings and sculptures that remained were magnificent […]” -> the repetition of “still” here seems like a mistake, and I think an adversarial conjunction would flow better.

      – “There was a man [] though[,] Alea didn’t notice him at first with his robes and stole, white with golden embroideries, which fit perfectly with the decor. ” -> I think that comma is in the wrong spot. If it came between man and thought it would flow a bit better, though I understand its placement here make for slightly different ideas to be presented.

      – And lastly, it might just be a stylistic choice, but the first sentence spoken by the Archbishop feels really weird. The excess of commas there might imply a paused cadence to his voice – but if that was the intent, it is strange that it is dropped after that first sentence. And even if it is, I don’t particularly appreciate that kind of punctuation as signaling cadence… but that can be just a me thing.

      Overall, very interesting narrative and some excellent descriptions. Some quite intriguing hooks for us to delve into the worldbuilding as well, though I feel like the narrative should be a little bit more wrapped up for it to stand perfectly on its own. Though it may be that I’m reviewing it with your other stories in mind, so my bar for quality is being quite high right now. Nonetheless, I really enjoyed spending a bit more time in this universe. Thanks a lot for sharing it!

  25. Shinigamma Avatar
    Shinigamma

    Rain on the Ant Parade
    by Shinigamma

    Angelica Ant clutched the flower seed, hurrying as quickly as she could back to the nest. A dark shadow had descended upon the grassy forest. A storm was coming; she could feel it in her exoskeleton.

    A drop descended from the sky and splashed all over her. Its putrid yellow liquid almost choked her, forcing her to drop her load. As she spluttered on the ground, she thought to herself that this was no ordinary rain.

    The heavens burst – and now Angelica and the rest of her arthropod kin were fleeing for their lives, as the foul-smelling droplets exploded in the dirt around them. Angelica dived beneath a grass blade, cowering as her formicidaean sisters scattered under the stinking deluge.

    “What the hell are you doing?” came a domineering voice above the golden monsoon.

    Angelica turned to face the angry mandibles of Sergeant Alexia snapping at her.

    “Get your ass back to the nest, filthy maggot!” barked the sergeant.

    That’s racist, thought Angelica.

    A rumbling drew both ants’ attention. They turned around… to face an oncoming wave of the rancid fluid barrelling towards them!

    “Take cover!” yelled Alexia, shoving Angelica against the grass blade.

    The wave swept over them, swamping both bugs in the fetid flow. Angelica gasped as she struggled to keep her head above the rushing torrents. As she did so, she caught sight of one of the male ants (Adam) being whisked by, wings flapping feebly in the poisonous current.

    Angelica grasped the grass blade with every leg and buried her head within it. When will this nightmare end?

    *

    Dennis exhaled deeply as he relieved himself by the side of the road. It had been a long journey and there’d been no restroom for miles. If he’d gone on for any longer, he’d have wet himself!

    He looked down. Hmm, an ant’s nest, he thought. Didn’t see that.

    Finally, he zipped up his trousers and marched back to the car. His wife, Nora, was sitting there, squinting at the road map.

    “Finished?” she asked.

    “Yep,” said Dennis, “Time to get back on the road!”

    1. The poor ant. Very interestingly done in mostly the ant’s pov. Nice

    2. I didn’t see that ending coming, and I feel like I should have. Also I love that his name is Dennis because it immediately makes me think of Dennis the Menace (which is an old cartoon strip if you weren’t aware).

      Only one negative to bring up, which is I feel the use of arthropod kin and formicidaean sisters was a tad too much, especially in the same paragraph. I’m not sure if it would read better with just one in the story, or merely separated, but I was pulled out of the story by the latter.

      Other than that, I love this style of story and the “That’s racist” line and the general funny that spreads through my cranium when I retrospect upon your stories!

    3. Strong Berry Avatar
      Strong Berry

      Easily the funniest thing I’ve seen from this prompt. I like how you take something as ordinary (But gross) as talking a piss, and turned it into an action story. The contrast is great: From the ants’ perspective that this yellow storm is coming at them to them, and then Dennis just treats it like how a lot of people would: Just some ants’ nest.

  26. Alice NW Avatar
    Alice NW

    Even the desert don’t last forever
    By Alice Northwood

    “Yuck!”
    Jack brushed the wet piece of snake innards off his face. “Rattle snakes taste like rot.”
    Hanna clicked her mouth.
    “You’re gonna have to suck it up. Nothin’ else to eat around here.” She spat. “Don’t have any more food cans after our last run with those damn poachers.”
    Defeated, Jack slouched on the hard sand and grabbed a stick piercing a piece of snake belly. He watched the flames swallow it, turning the bloody piece into a rubbery steak.
    “I hate the desert.”
    “I know. But even the desert don’t last forever. You’ll see.”
    Jack rolled his eyes and yanked a bite off his stick, letting the hot juice burn his cracked lips.

    They packed up as soon as the sun peeked over the sand dunes..
    Later that day, he stumbled on a rock and the sole of his right boot came off, so Hanna tied it up with an old piece of cloth. It kept his foot protected, but the boot filled with sand with every step he took. It would make their trail twice as slow from now on.
    “Do you even know where we are?”
    “Sure I do. Old U.S. of A, the big Californian post-end-of-the-world desert. Population: you, me and a bunch of losers who just can’t seem to die off.”
    “Yeah, but…”
    He trailed off as a noisy bird interrupted him in the distance.
    Hanna perked her head for a moment and then dashed off towards the screechy squawk.

    Jack trailed behind her, getting his foot caught in the sand every other step.
    The sandhills turned sharply downwards, and he lost his balance, sliding towards Hanna. She stood panting, a stupid smile frozen on her face.
    His eyes burned from the salt, but his burnt lips rejoiced in the humidity pushed by the swallowing waves.

    For the second time in his life, he saw the ocean.
    In the distance, the big ships that carried the remainder of this side of humanity lulled softly.
    He grabbed Hanna’s shaking hand and squeezed tight.
    “You see Jack? I told you the desert don’t last forever.”

    1. Concept interesting. It and correct me if I’m wrong of it having a feeling of dystopian with a slight hint of sci fi? Very nice how this piece turned out. 🙂

    2. This was an intriguing story. I’m particularly interested in the setting and how these two fairly normal (I read them as) kids survived this long. Now, having read to the end, I want to know even MORE about the setting because humanity is surviving on big ships? Awesome. As for Jack and Hanna, I like Hanna but Jack needs to “find his footing” before I think I can enjoy him as a character.

    3. Newt Manhattan Avatar
      Newt Manhattan

      This is a lovely bit of writing. The character dialogue is snappy and the characters are made more likable for it. Post apocalypse is a fun trope to play with and I like how you accentuated the effort that survival takes with their meals and issues while traveling.

  27. Why Can’t it Keep Raining Forever?

    By Basil 

    The everlasting thick coat of murky-grey overcast prevented any pestersome rays of sunshine from piercing their way down to the Earth’s surface. While most of the world was sulking in their lack of a good tan, the creatures of the underbelly were rejoicing. Or at least, the few of us that were left. Without humans roaming about, my clan hesitantly decided we could finally explore the surface of the world.

    And so, we crawled out of the crevices in the crust, and escaped the labyrinth of intertwined caves we had called our home. My entire being was flooded with hope, fueled by every drop in the cascading array of rainfall. The darkness had always been a safe-haven for us, and now the sickeningly bright world was covered head to toe in a blanket of black. I leapt out of the hole I was forced in and slithered across the pavement and grasses. I splashed in the puddles and bathed in the shadows. Each strike of thunder was a song of freedom rejoicing in my ears.

    My clan and I were finally free to explore, free to just exist without judgement. And we all took on this excited attitude, cast in an aura of joy and hope, as this never-ending rain for us meant never-ending prosperity. All of us played happily in the puddles. All except for one. The eldest slither sulked still with their tentacles crossed, hovering around the crevice he emerged from.

    I perked up from my play and crawled over to him, the rain playing its song of hope with every drip and drop that hit my scales. His spine was arched downwards and he crossed his limbs, barely meeting my strong eye-contact.

    “Sir, come play. Look at the sky, nothing but clouds in sight! Were finally free! Be happy!”

    His sapphire eyes pierced holes into the pavement below us, as his grumpy deminere painted him in a depressing light. He glared over to my enthusiastic gaze. “Enjoy it while it last kid…” He grumbled. “It can’t rain forever.”

    1. Shinigamma Avatar
      Shinigamma

      Interesting piece. I’m glad that the slithers weren’t evil creatures seeking to take the surface world over from the humans, more that they just wanted some extra time to play about in the dark and damp night.

      Of course there’s always one grump who has to spoil the fun for everyone!

      This does raise a question though. Even when the Sun can still shine, surely the slithers can come out at night anyway?

      Or maybe they already do….

      Nice work!

      1. That’s true. I think it’s more humans are still out more at night. I’m thunderstorms almost nobody is outside, so it’s safer. 🧡

    2. Fog Wall Avatar
      Fog Wall

      This makes me think of octopi evolved besides or ahead of humans. I liked the style and descriptions in this. I don’t have any complaints other than why not give it the character a name?

      Otherwise, the way you leaned into the setting made my imagination go a little wild with how this storn came to be. I feel theres a lot more to this setting that we don’t get to see. I do love the free excitement this little one has for the surface, makes me think of snow days as a kid. Thank you for the smile.

      1. I thought not giving the character a name would leave it more up to interpretation and allow the reader to insert themself into the story a bit more, but I can get the confusion hehe. Thanks for the feedback! Your to kind!

    3. Awww this is such a fun take on the prompt! It’s such a rich setting. I love the twist on the prompt in making the rain a good thing for these adorable squiddies. Lol I’d imagine that’s even worse for the humans actually. Not only are they stuck inside, but there’s a bunch of squid creatures excitedly roaming about.

      The slithers themselves are described so well. Just little hints here and there of what they are, how they live and why this makes them so happy. The reader can’t help but to have the same excitement as the protagonist.

      Lol and while the older slither is very much a downer to everyone’s fun, I can absolutely see where he’s coming from, which does make him relatable as well.

      Excellent take on the prompt! Thanks for sharing!

      1. Aww your so sweet! I honestly forgot I posted here! I wish I got notifications with replies otherwise I definitely would have replied sooner! Thank you so much for the feedback! I had a lot of fun writing this, and with such little time I felt it was more fun to let the reader interpret how the little guys roam about and how life evolved to be like this. Thankies!

  28. Tamela Redfin Avatar
    Tamela Redfin

    After Rain is a Rainbow

    By Tamela Redfin

    Corlita entered the living room of the building where Henry and Cora lived. Corlita was told she was allowed to enter, and it was a nice way to escape the autumn rain she decided. As she crept into the living room, she could hear a sharp snipping.

    “Ms. Valentine, what are you doing?” Corlita asked. She watched as Cora tried to lay on the cabin floor before giving up and moving to a chair. Couldn’t have been easy laying like that at four months.

    “Trying to cut out my ex from all these pictures.” Cora snipped away at the photos, humming as she did so.

    Corlita spotted something she didn’t expect to see when Cora looked at her. “Your eyes are green, like mine.”

    Cora nodded. “Augen altered them to be black, but they are naturally green.” She pointed to a little girl. “Anyway, that’s my daughter, Engel. It’s Cryspellen for Angel.”

    Gears turned in Corlita’s head. “Wait, I remember getting ice cream there. I always got the green one.”

    “Pistacho, I remember.” Cora asked.

    “Y-yeah how did you know?” Corlita blinked.

    “You always got that and I always tried to remember.”

    Corlita sat down on the hardwood next to Cora. “You keep saying that, but I don’t understand. Your daughter’s name was Engel?”

    “It was. At one point.” Cora set down the scissors and looked at Corlita with a deep unexplainable hurt.

    ‘Maybe I could lie and say I remember being her.’ Corlita thought, but feared hurting Cora more. Besides, it seemed she had enough on her plate.

    “Wait, that one!” Corlita turned pale, though she never had that dark a skin. That was Mally, her friend. Her… cousin.

    ‘If Mally is my cousin, I must be related to Cora. He has a brother, but I do have Cora’s eyes.’ She thought. Her mouth quickly went dry, and a tear slid down her cheek.

    “Mom?”

    1. Alice NW Avatar
      Alice NW

      I really liked this story. I can imagine how Cora desperately hoped for the last word in the story.
      I like how the story picked up the pace as Corlita’s memories started running through her, you can feel the rush that must be happening inside her brain.
      Nicely done, keep writing!

    2. For the next story, your challenge is to set the scene without anyone entering the room 😀 Just describe the firkin place enough to give us an idea of the scene.

      Typo alert: “You always go that…” you either meant “go there” or “got that”

      Nagging aside, you’re improving with expanding your narrative.

  29. The Rain Came

    Beauty is a fading flower, though it can’t rain all the time. 

    That’s what they’ve always told me over the years and for a while, I believed it without question. Until … today, when they came to take it away. They’re all set at the controls as they await their orders. 
    How could you do this to me? You said we were brothers!  I guess you’re not one to understand that word, “brothers.” You will sell your soul out to the highest bidder. You’d destroy it without a moment’s hesitation. Everything we’d worked towards, all the progress we’d made, all for nothing. 

    Every time it rains now, I’ll be reminded of this dreadfully painful day. The day you destroyed… us all for, not love, not friendship, not compassion and not humanity itself.  
    But— your selfish needs.  

    Even in the years we are in, right now. You’re still a foolish fool. A small shell of a human, even a child like being that once existed, cannot save the things you only half created and yet so ready to destroy. What we have built with our own two hands. Just to be martyred for —? 

    Of course, you can’t answer it, can you? 

    You always struggle to answer such a straightforward question. Feel free in your attempts to destroy it. You are welcome to try, actually. However, certainly I can promise you, won’t be able to. You know why? It can’t be destroyed! No matter how many times you try to. It can’t be destroyed, all can’t be destroyed. Because they’re far too smart to be and end up the ones that perish. They can’t be, just because of your a being, a small shell of something that maybe may have once been—of some sort. Even as the wrecking ball tries to take way what is now, it can’t even take away what once was . No it can’t rain all the time.

    The rain can only last for so long before even it gets tired and lets the sun return to the skies.

    1. Alice NW Avatar
      Alice NW

      I enjoyed reading your piece. I thought it was very interestingly written, like a dialogue that can be internal or external, something the character is telling his “brother” or something he is thinking he would say if he could.
      I like this type of writing, it was different than what I usually read. Nicely done!

      1. Thank you, Alice. I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed it. I really enjoyed writing this piece.

  30. Summer Time Shower (Darkspell Universe)
    By Alex Nightingale (aka Spectre)

    The appropriate way to describe Valerie’s current mood was that of a grumpy cartoon figure, with a vertical unibrow across its forehead. It hadn’t stopped raining for the past 3 hours, as she stood at the beach, soaking up the rainwater, while dressed in her swimsuit and a light, summer shirt.

    The thing about this particular rain was that the only place it was actually pouring, was within a radius of half a meter around Valerie’s head and exclusively, nowhere else. Mia stood next to her friend, frantically flipping through the e-book version of Raining Curses: An Introduction, looking for the appropriate counter spell.

    “I told you, not to be snarky to that old woman,” Mia chastised her, as she tried again, unsuccessfully.

    “Yes, so you keep telling me,” Valerie sulked, blowing a strand of wet hair out of her face. “How much longer?”

    “Don’t rush me. That woman used kobold hexes. Those are barely understood by the best scholars. I’m calling Max.”

    Mia pulled out her phone and dialled the exorcist’s number. As Valerie watched, Mia’s crow Konrad examined the dark cloud over her head, his own head cocked sideways.

    “Don’t worry,” he cawed. “We’ll get you back into the sun in no time.”

    “Thanks,” Valerie muttered.

    “Why does it always rain on me,” Konrad started to sing.

    She shot him a look, causing the crow to caw and flutter around her. Mia had turned away from the two, to try and focus on what Max was telling her. It didn’t take long, however, before she hung up and turned back to her friend.

    “So,” she clapped her hands together. “Curses like this can be unwoven, but only with a lot of effort and equipment which, quite frankly, I don’t have with me.”

    Valerie and Konrad stared at her.

    “Well… then what?” Valerie asked, pointing up.

    “Plan B. We wait for it to wear off.”

    “That’s it?”

    “Yep. It can’t keep raining forever, otherwise we’d never have a drought problem.”

    Valerie groaned and held her head back, letting the magical rain hit her in the face.

    1. Ooh I adore this one! I love how you incorporated a sort of magic realism, the characters talk about spells and stuff so nonchalantly I love it. And props to you for just incorporating it without lofty explanations, it leaves a lot about this world to interpretation and gives it a sort of soft world building that is missing from a lot of modern media. Also, the way you incorporated the titular line was very clever. Your descriptions are the perfect length, not feeling to wordy, giving room for the dialogue to breathe, but still crafted with a layer of elegance that makes the reading fun. Overall, great job! This was so fun to read!

    2. I love the humour in this piece. It feels so very close to Sir Terry Pratchett [GNU] with the curse and the method used. I love that this is the kind of curse that’s more annoying than any variety of life threatening.

      I love that you remembered that Valerie can’t go near any tech because of her rain cloud. Marvellous attention to detail.

      Part of me wonders if True Love’s Kiss should be mentioned as a potential cure…

  31. If You Keep On Believing, A Dream That You Wish Will Come True
    By Marx

    “I’m sick of this!” Ella shouted, petulantly stomping her little feet. “I’m sick of all these stupid demons! I wanna go outsiiiiiiiiiiii-yeeeeeede”

    Cindy sighed. “I know this isn’t fair, child. But it–”

    “–won’t always be this way.” Ella mocked, stomping to her bed, arms crossed and lip poked out. “That’s what you always say…”

    “…Do you remember the man who brought me to you?”

    “…the scary man with the black eyes?”

    “Yes.” Cindy chuckled. “He’s doing everything in his power to fix this world. And the demons think he’s scary too. I promise you child, this won’t last forever.”

    There was silence as Ella stopped actively complaining, but Cindy frowned as the little girl kept sulking. That was when inspiration hit Cindy and she began casting a spell in her mind. “You know… he stopped by earlier today with a gift.”

    Ella’s attention immediately snapped to Cindy. “…gift?”

    Cindy reached behind her, finishing the spell and brought forth the conjured pair of transparent slippers.

    Ella’s eyes bulged as she let out a tiny squeal. “Are those–?”

    “He found them for me. Would you like to try them on?”

    Cindy had never seen the little girl move so quickly in her life. In a flash, Ella was on the floor and slipping her feet into the slippers, which shrank to fit. With more subtle spellcasting, Cindy conjured the illusion of an elegant blue ball dress and the tiara to match.

    “Eeeeeeeeeee!” Ella screamed as she twirled and then ran for her mother at the door. “Mommy! Mommy! I’m a princess!”

    Her mother chuckled with a wide grin. “You look beautiful, sweetheart. Why don’t you show your father?”

    “Daddy! DADDYYYYYYY!”

    The two women watched Ella run down the hall before the mother gave Cindy a look. “They aren’t actually made of glass, are they?”

    “Of course not.”

    “Didn’t you say your slippers were gold?”

    Cindy nodded. “She prefers the glass slipper version.”

    “She does.” Ella’s mother chuckled, before her amusement fell. “Can your friend really stop all this madness?”

    “He can.” Cindy replied, looking out the window. “He will.”

    1. This is great! Oftentimes I get annoyed with how a lot of people write kids, but Ella genuinely seems like a child. She isn’t dumb or a psychopath, she is sulking and sad that the rain won’t stop. It’s interesting to see a supernatural event from the perspective of a child, and again- I love how much you leave up to interpretation here. I love the merging of genres. Ella is a beautiful princess after all! I love the characterization of Cindy and the mother as well, it’s overall a really easy and fun read! Awesome job!

      1. Thank you so much! I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Lol and I do fully agree with you that it can be very frustrating when children aren’t written like children. Very happy to hear that I dodged that particular bullet.

    2. Berith Quinn Avatar
      Berith Quinn

      I really do love how well you captured how children are. Most aren’t stupid, nor do they act like little adults. They act and see the world in a different way to adults. And Ella is a perfect example of that. From sulking to elated in a blink of an eye that just feels natural.

      Would love to know who the man with the black eyes is.

      1. Thanks so much! Very happy that you enjoyed the story and that Ella’s characterization came through so well.

        This is actually a side story from my extended universe where Matt(the man with the black eyes) is the main character lol. He’s the horseman of Death so him being seen as feared does make sense.

  32. It Never Rains When it Pours [Amalgam Universe]
    C. M. Weller

    Some people get all the luck. People hear a term like “Lucker” and think that they get all the breaks. I guess I DO get all the breaks… if you count broken bones.

    I’m a BAD Lucker. I get the bad luck. The bad breaks in more ways than one. For my own safety, I live in a padded house with the kind of architecture that couldn’t possibly fall down. All bolted to the bedrock on a Havenworld where literally nothing can hurt me.

    And I can hurt nothing. Not even by accident.

    All that said, I find a way to bruise myself on something every day. I soak my clothes when I wash my hands no matter WHAT I do about it. The random meal generator always gives me walnut fig dough surprise, though I have to use it to keep the balance in check.

    If I don’t use my bad luck on little things, it’ll find me in bigger ways.

    I’m alone here. The most I get out to do things is picking up the supplies crate from the neighbouring valley. They always miss. My bad luck there. It’s always in an organic container that can’t possibly hurt me, and the supplies are inert, squishy bags of stable elements for the printers. All I have to do is load them and stand well back when they’re running. Food. Clothing. Furniture if I need it… any printer works when I’m not looking. Everything here is artificial.

    That’s why it was such a surprise when the cat turned up.

    Not a Skitty for pest control. A regular everyday Felis Domesticus. Black as the ace of spades with deep yellow eyes.

    I stepped on her when we met, and she keeps… following me. When I sit, she curls up on my lap and purrs like a thunderstorm.

    Weird thing? My luck’s got a little better since she got here. All that goes wrong is tripping over a black cat in the dark.

    She must be good luck. I haven’t broken anything since she got here.

    1. Nice inversion of the black cat bringing bad luck folktale. Since it usually turns good luck sour, so it makes sense for a black cat to turn bad luck into good fortune. I like the irony of that.

      The story is also really interesting. The idea of someone being so unlucky, that they are forced to self-proof their home is at first glance pretty comedic, but if you end up breaking everything you ever owned, that turns pretty tragic very quickly. The inclusion of the cat does make me think that some kind of curse is also at work here.

      Well done!

      1. It’s genetic in this universe. The Luck Gene has some weird expressions sometimes.

        OTOH, black cats are good luck if you OWN them. A little factoid most people miss out on.

        When writing this, I was thinking of that one TikTok with the Russian(?) guy who has a black cat. This poor cogniscent needed a little improvement in their lot and the surprise cat was it.

    2. Tamela Redfin Avatar
      Tamela Redfin

      Obligatory “Aw da kitty.”

      You did a great job with explaining what a Bad Lucker is. Which is a problem with some stories: they create a fancy title, but never/poorly explain what said title means.

      This one you explained, showed how it effected the life and a clear solution. All of it makes for a good story.

      1. As I keep telling you, a little description can do a lot of work

    3. Fog Wall Avatar
      Fog Wall

      I like this, being that I carry weird luck everywhere I go. I can kind of relate. Having two black cats, botg with yellow eyes, I am happy to see them every morning and night, evem whem they try to take the lead and almost trip me in a daily routine. Props for the imaginative spin on good and bad luck.

      obligatory mrowr! good story!

      1. Three cheers for the weird luck people 😀 and black cats

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